Secrets
by Sakuras Heart Healer
Summary: A secret relationship stirs around the host club, how long can they keep it hidden and what happens when its threatened by outside forces and even more secrets form between them. Who will be the victory love, or fear. Rating might change!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Ok so this is just a story I thought about for a while. Not really got any idea where to go with it, but I wanted to get back into writing, a warm up for my camp :D Hope you enjoy, remember REVIEW and maybe I'll update a little faster ;) love you all!

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_**Prolog**_

_**Secrets**_

_How did it ever end up like this?_ Haruhi wondered feeling his body pressing to her back. His breath was so warm and comforting pressing into that bare patch of skin between her hair and shirt collar. His hands were locked around her waist possessively and she welcomed the restraint. She wondered if he'd fallen asleep, she couldn't help but smile at the thought.

"Are you awake?" She asked softly not trying to turn to see his handsome face. She waited, staring at the pillow as if it would sprout lips and answer for him.

"Hey, wake up." She giggled a little at the grunt that greeted her elbow as she pressed it back into the soft flesh of his abdomen.

"That wasn't very nice of you. I was having a good dream." His deep voice was whispered and caressed her neck. She shivered when she felt his lips touch the nape of her neck where the short hair cut ended.

"What was this dream?" She asked trying to keep herself distracted from his touch.

"I was sleeping next to a beautiful girl." She felt him smile against her neck as he spoke.

"Oh really? And who is this beautiful girl?" She asked smiling as he propped himself up and looked down into her face. She turned on her back smiling as his handsome features came into view.

"Haruhi, it was you, of course." He smiled as she blushed, even though she'd known what he was about to say.

"You are so beautiful." He touched her face with his hand and smiled that smile that only she got to see. The one of a man who was happy, if only for this moment.

"It's time for me to go home now." Her voice ended the smile and he sighed and nodded crawling across her body and off the bed. Haruhi followed standing and wrapping her arms around his middle. The softness of his shirt pressed to her face and she inhaled his smell. Looking to the side of them Haruhi saw the mirror that reflected their images. They were a cute pair.

"I'm guessing you want to walk back again?" He asked unable to keep the grin from his face as he too watched the pair in the mirror. She seemed so small compared to him. The way her head rested just below his shoulder. He clasped his hands over hers and they remained silent for a moment.

"Yes, I don't feel like announcing….this to everyone just yet." She smiled and released him.

"As you wish, my dear."  
"Hey, you agreed same as me." She got defensive and he turned looking at her.

"I know, I know." He kissed her forehead and his glasses flashed in the light of the room.

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A/N: ok just a little teaser of what can become of it. Please review :D


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Wow I am so out of writing shape, having a lot of difficulties trying to pump out some good stuff. Bare with me my wonderful readers. I'll try and work out the kinks in my system. Please review so I know I'm getting back into shape :D thanks for reading, please enjoy this moment of life for Haruhi!

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**Chapter 1**

**A Moment of life**

**Five Months ago**

Haruhi looked up as Kyouya crossed the band room, later than usual she noted. He seemed….agitated? She cringed at that moment of realization. She hoped he would go easy with her today. She had been studying her math and other forms of tedious homework with him for the past few weeks and she found herself really getting content with their time together, if not always pleasant, but it was time together all the same. She found herself sitting less rigidly, sliding closer than usual when he sat on the couch beside her. Leaning across his shoulder to ask questions when he was working on his laptop. Laughing and joking as they sat together. Things were getting….stranger.

"Are you alright, Senpai?" Haruhi asked taking a few steps back putting the chair between her and him. She hoped this action would bring out the amused smile he'd shown her on a few occasions, but it only made him stop as if she'd spat at him.

"Perfectly, Haruhi." His voice seemed cold, she even shivered!

"Are you sure?" She persisted coming from around the chair to stand a little closer. He seemed to tense even more and she took a step back again.

"What are you having problems with now?" He asked sitting himself down roughly on one of the many soft cushioned chairs. Haruhi gathered her math book and walked towards, him her gaze wary all the while.

"I need help here; I don't understand how they got the answer." She pointed to a complex problem involving square roots, graphing and trig functions. Her head began to hurt all over again just seeing it in all its evilness. He snatched away her pencil and began to scribble on her notebook showing the process of the problem as if it was as easy as 2+2.

"There." He dropped the pencil and stared at her thorugh the glare in his glasses. Haruhi didn't even glance at the solved problem, she instead stared at her new one.

"What is wrong with you." She demanded folding her arms. He hadn't been in a bad mood like this before and she wasn't going to stand for him to take it out on her.

"I said nothing Haruhi. Aren't you even going to look at the problem?" He asked again his brows crinkling into his forehead. Haruhi felt her stomach crunch as she lifted her hand but her action happened before she could stop it. She reached up and smoothed out the lines that creased on his forehead. She saw the surprise cross his face and the glare moved away from his glasses as if she'd wiped them clean.

"I-I'm sorry, I don't know why I did that. Thank you for helping me." She stuttered quickly gathering her things into her bags. She stood ready to flee but she felt a hand enclose around her arm and halt her roughly.

"No, don't leave." His voice sounded strained, she turned wondering what had him so stressed.

"Kyouya-Senpai?" She mumbled softly turning to see the anguish in his eyes. "What's wrong with you?" She asked again letting her hand lift and rest on his face. She felt her stomach turn again as his skin contacted against hers. It was soft and warm; she wanted to hug him suddenly but held herself back wondering what was propelling her into such actions. He was Kyouya, the shadow king of the host club, a boy who was only interested in merit and money. Why was he causing her to do such things.

"Haruhi…." He sighed letting go of her arm. He pulled away from her touch and removed his glasses as his back turned on her. She saw him rubbing the spot between his eyes. She felt more concerned instantly.

"Tell me what's wrong, maybe I can help you. You've been so….kind to me these last few weeks." She walked forward and touched his shoulder. She heard his sigh and a soft chuckle.

"Help me? Maybe you can." He turned so suddenly Haruhi's bag fell from her shoulder as she was suddenly grasped in his hands. Both her wrists fell captive to his hands and she stumbled back till she fell to the couch. Kyouya landed on top of her but he kept from crushing her and stayed hovering over her.

"What are you doing?" She mumbled nothing more than a whisper to him.

"This." He leaned down suddenly but it was a gesture filled with such hesitation Haruhi realized how nervous he really was. Kyouya? Nervous? The great shadow king that used others to his purpose was nervous?

Haruhi let go of those thoughts and realized he was kissing her! His lips were pressed like a feather to hers and they were softer then his skin had been. He pulled back a breath between them and Haruhi stared into the dark orbs of his eyes. She saw all the uncertainty, the care, the fear, the man behind the glasses.

The abruptly he released her and stood, rigidly she saw. She sat up still a little dumb struck by what had just happened, and what she had seen. He kept his back to her not looking to see her reaction. He wanted to kick himself for giving into such a weakness, but then he felt something press against his back just below his shoulder blades, she was so small.

"What was that for?" Her voice a whisper warm against his back. He closed his eyes loving the contact, if only for this moment. He didn't answer her, he deiced to go with his winning instincts and turn around. She stood there small and innocent looking up at him with those lovely chocolate eyes. He smiled and touched her face with one hand and lifted it up a little higher.

"Lets just say, I was trying to live for a moment." He waited for a response and as he suspected she closed her eyes in a graceful bat of her eyes.

Haruhi responded to this kiss and couldn't believe how her stomach clenched at the contact.

_This is going to be interesting_. They both thought losing themselves in the first kiss of many.

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A/N: Ok so there's kinda like a memory of how they go together, like I said trying to work myself back into shape. Hope you enjoyed this Please please review my lovely readers :D thank you !


	3. Chapter 3

A/N:Thanks for all of you have reviewed I love you all so much. Hope you enjoy this chapter :)

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**Chapter 2**

**A Near Miss**

Kyouya looked up and down the street feeling much like a stalker as he climbed the apartment steps. The sun was setting and shadows danced with his as he climbed, he felt irritated by the need to be so disguised and sneaky, but then again what was not worth the smile that awaited him? Looking around again through the shadow of his hood he knocked quietly on Haruhi's door. He waited fighting off the urge to shuffle his feet. Finally it opened like a sweet breath of relief.

"Hello Kyouya-Senpai." Haruhi mumbled peering around, a bright warm smile filling up her features. Kyouya's face lit up, something he realized only she could draw out of him. Any other time he was cold, even when he was meant to please someone it was never warm and inviting like when he was with her.

"Hello, Haruhi." He sounded so formal and she couldn't help but giggle.

"I made some popcorn, got the sodas and the movies ready to go." Haruhi's eyes twinkled excitedly at the prospect of snuggling close to this man's chest all night long. Kyouya grinned amused by her childish ways.

"Sounds wonderful." But he had no real desire, or interest in movies, or even the food. He'd come to be with her, next to her. Surrounded in the smell of her and the warmth of her body. Kyouya often felt like a giddy child around her, but of course he would never let her know.

The two settled down on the couch Haruhi a soft brown throw blanket draped around her as she leaned against Kyouya. He removed his "stalker" sweater throwing it across the chair and settling himself on the couch. He'd gone through this routine of visiting with her for nearly five months now but he still felt out of place when she would lean against his chest her hand placed on his heart. He felt so close to her, closer than anyone should be, but all the same he craved this contact, the push of her breath on his skin, the smile of her lips pressing to his face. It was all too surreal to desire on his own, having it handed to him lovingly, he would not deny it.

"Kyouya what are you looking at?" Haruhi asked peering up into his eyes as he stared. He blinked a few times clearing the thoughts from his eyes and smiled at his little angel.

"Nothing my dear." He slid his fingers into her hair and brought her face up into a kiss. Haruhi could never get over the feeling of him pressed to her like this. The way his hand cupped the back of her head making her feel secure, trapped even, against his lips. But she was never afraid of this closeness.

"Watch the movie, Kyouya." Haruhi giggled pulling away from with a smile. Her face was highlighted making her seem even cuter then before. Kyouya grinned but never took his eyes from her face.

"Why would I do that, when I can do this." He leaned into her this time and she wrapped her arms around his neck as he kissed her sweetly.

"Haruhi!" The two teens jumped sky high as fists banged on her front door.

"Oh my god is that…" Haruhi's fear was confirmed when Hikaru raised his voice louder.

"Haruhi open up!" They continued to pound on the door mercilessly.

"What are you going to do?" She hissed whispering to Kyouya.

"Go answer the door." He quickly shuffled out of the room and Haruhi hurried to the front door looking flustered. What could they possibly want?

"What are you two doing here?" Haruhi snapped opening the front door just enough for her to be seen. There they were standing against one another arms folding looked cheerfully menacing.

"We came to see you. You never spend time with us anymore." Kaoru whined. She saw their eyes lingering behind her and she couldn't help but close the door a little more around her.

"Well banging on my door, at night even! Is not the best way to get me to go without with you guys again." Haruhi felt her temper rise and was thankful for that, better to be angry then nervous and fidgety around them.

"We just wanted to see if you wanted to come to a club with us. We have something you could even wear if you wanted." Hikaru grinned. Haruhi felt a vein pulse in her head.

"No thank you. I don't want to go out with you two tonight."

"So grumpy." Hikaru pouted as Kaoru pushed open the door and slipped past Haruhi's protests. She felt her heart start to hammer and wondered if hers and Kyouya's secretwas about to be spilled out into the open. The thought terrified her; this was something that could tear the host club apart, let alone them.

"Get out of my house!" She tried to grab him in desperation but Hikaru was there to protect his brother and the twins slipped away from her grasp and into the living room giggling the whole way. Haurhi's heart was in her through as she followed them. Then they stopped, silent Haruhi felt herself grow cold.

"Who's here with you?" HIkaru asked fingering the sweater KYouya had thrown across the chair. Haruhi stared wide eyed at it. His voice was tense and felt just a little to heavy in the air. Haruhi's heart was like a sledge hammer on a frozen lake.

"No one, besides you guys. Now get out." Kaoru was looking and whispering to Hikaru as they looked at the double sodas, the popcorn, and movie. She could see it all now, they would find Kyouya and announce the secret to the host club. She would stand there and watch the friendships fall apart along with the entire group. She had to do something, something to save them all from that.

"You're lying to us Haruhi, that's so not nice."

"Who's here?" They insisted still holding onto the sweater as if it was a murder weapon.

"No one, and besides it's my house how would it be any of your business about who's in my house." Haruhi was trying to keep her cool; she hoped they couldn't hear her pounding heart and see the sweat glistening on her trembling hands. "And how do you even know that's not my sweater? Or even my fathers?" She raised her brows and folded her arms defensively. The twins glanced at each other skeptically.

"Get out now, I have things that need to be done." Haruhi grabbed the sweater away and the sent of Kyouya filled her nose. She hoped neither boy would recognize the smell.

Hikaru looked wounded and Kaoru followed his brother from the house.

"Will you come out with us this weekend then?" Kaoru tried seeing the pain in his brothers eyes. Haruhi thought about it, but shook her head feeling guilty for causing them grief.

"We'll see." And then she closed the door and waited till the boys had driven away into the night.

"Kyouya?" She called looking around the apartment. Silence. Had he jumped out a window? She wondered finding the idea disturbing, and humorous.

"Kyouya why didn't you answer me?" Haruhi demanding finally finding the teen perched on the edge of her bed a frame in his hands.

"I like your hair short." He mumbled looking at the frame the entire time. Haruhi smiled and walked towards him. She crawled on to the bed behind him and wrapped her arms around his neck nuzzling her face into his neck.

"Do you think the twins suspect something?" Kyouya grinned as Haruhi snorted.

"I think they suspect someone was here with me, the living room scene kinda gave that away." She kissed his neck lightly and sighed. "Are you sure this is the best thing for us?" She hated to say those words and the tension in his shoulders was enough to make her cry.

"Don't worry about anything." He turned forcing her to sit back. "Things will be just fine. Don't let this….near miss, worry you." He smiled a smile that had her heart doing flips.

"Alright." She giggled and pulled him to her with courage she only got from him. He hugged her body and chuckled as he fell upon her raining her face with kisses.

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A/N: There you go, hope that's a good chapter, I feel so out of shape :P hopefully I'll get better with this. Please review thanks for reading :D


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 3**

**Midnight thoughts**

Kyouya lay there that night just watching Haruhi as she slept in his arms. It was nearing midnight now and he knew he'd have to leave soon. It was never a pleasant moment when he would whisper goodbyes to her and leave, but he knew it was necessary. Imagine what her father would think if he was to come home and find his darling daughter curled tight against a boy's body, in her bed none the less. Kyouya grinned, nothing ever happened in this bed, but it still amused him to think of the implications.

He glanced down in the darkness at the curved body of Haruhi laying next to him. Her breathing was even and slow, sleeping peacefully no doubt. He ran his fingers across her face and waited for her to wake up.

"Kyouya?" She mumbled rubbing the sleep in her eyes.

"Its time for me to go my dear." He continued to carasse her face with soft finger tips.'

"Already?" He smiled at her disappointment but nodded.

"Yes, go back to sleep, I'll see myself out." He kissed her eyes till she fell back and back into her dreams, unwillingly.

Kyouya stood over her bed for a little bit longer and watched her sleeping with the moonlight a blanket around her. The house was quiet, the evidence of his visit was still spread across the living room. Popcorn crumbles, empty soda cans and his jacket thrown into the corner after the twins visit. He retrieved it and replaced it as he walked from her apartment making sure to lock the door as he left.

Finally crawling into his own bed that night Kyouya felt his mind wondering over the conversation he'd heard Haruhi have with Hikaru and Kaoru. They'd suspected someone was here, they'd confronted her with his sweater. He wondered just how much they would investigate. The twins were stubborn at best and Hikaru watched Haruhi with a little more than friendship in mind. He was certain that they would have to be lead down a different path if his relationship with Haruhi was to remain a secret. And of that he was sure was to remain a priority. To expose this would be something much worse then he could even muster up. Having the host club know about them would destroy much more then just a financial investment.

Haruhi….his mind wandered over to her again and he felt a pinch on his heart. He would have to tell her eventually. Oh, but how he wished that he could avoid hurting her with this information.

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A/N: Just a short little chapter about Kyouya hoping to add up some spice in here. : ) please review!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I hope you are enjoying this story. Please keep reviewing and reading. I love you all

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**Chapter 4**

**Guests**

"What exactly is this about?" Kyouya asked impatiently holding his laptop on his lap closed and off, much to his irritation. Hikaru and Kaoru were leading this little host meeting, but Haruhi was absent from it. Strange.

"This is about our dear little Haruhi." Hikaru started out pressing just the right button to launch Tamaki off automatically.

"What! What has happened to her! Is she safe, why is she not here!" He leapt to his feet and grabbed Hikaru by the collar and began to shake him violent his words pouring out in a blind, fatherly panic.

"What has happened Haruhi! Will she be alright?" Hunny piped in suddenly his big innocent eyes filling with tears. Mori patted the boys head calming him quickly.

"Hikaru stop with this game, why are we here?" Kyouya interjected Tamaki's panic and the twins laugh. He felt a little acceleration in his chest. Did they know? No, of course they didn't, there was no way…..right?

"We went to visit Haruhi last," One twin started

"And to our surprise when we arrived."

"Another person was there, no doubt hiding from our views." The room seemed to go dead silent. Kyouya kept his composer calm, and cold. They would never be able to tell by the expression on his face if he was involved with this mysterious stranger.

"Why were you at Haruhi's apartment last night!" Tamaki all but screeched at the twins. They giggled like they always did and Kyouya started to feel agitated by this whole scene. He started to think the twins had no idea who was there, but only to stir up trouble with the good host king.

"That doesn't seem to be the main issue here, my lord." Kaoru laughed snickering with his brother as they moved away from the angry king.

"The issues is, Haruhi's having late night "guests" over." Kaoru and Hikaru leaned on either side of Tamaki and Kyouya watched as the boys face fell from anger into horror.

"What! Our sweet innocent little flower is being bothered by …guests!" He gulped the last word like it was the vilest thing in the world. Kyouya felt humor building in his stomach, they really were idiots. Here he was the "guest" they all thought was ….defiling their innocent little girl and they were all too excite to see it. His glasses glimmered as the smile lined his lips, this could get interesting. Maybe there was a merit to this secret that he hadn't thought of before.

"What is going on here?" Everyone turned around to see Haruhi standing in the door way completely surprised to see the group standing there. Hikaru and Kaoru slipped across the room and dragged Haruhi into the middle of the group. Tamaki was dabbing at his eyes dramatically with a tissue.

"We are all concerned about you Haruhi." The twins started but before they got any further Tamaki rushed forward and seized his daughter by the shoulders.

"Who has touched you! Who's been hounding you at night?" Tamaki's voice raised a pitch with each word till Haruhi was covering her ears.

"What the hell are you talking about!" She pushed him away her temper already boiling to the surface.

"The twins say you are having guest late into the nights Haruhi." Kyouya stood and pushed his glasses up his nose making them glimmer in the morning light. Haruhi turned to him her lips thin, she would not speak, he knew this. _Time to play._ HE thought finding amusement in this awkward situation for her.

"Is this true?" He asked waiting for her response. Haruhi looked at each host member in turn then finally laid her eyes on Kyouya once more.

"Since when has my personal business become such an important topic for you?" She folded her arms and her anger was not acting. He could see it in her eyes, she was furious, but over….she was scared? A pinch at his heart again but he pushed it away. IT was not the moment to be emotional over a girl.

"Since it could affect the image of the host club, and its members." Kyouya made a simple gesture that swept across the room and the host members.

"Who are you seeing Haruhi?" Tamaki's attitude changed completely and both Kyouya and Haruhi turned to him surprised. His face was shadowed even downcast. Haruhi's heart began to hammer, there was that guilt again. The hurt was so evident on his face.

"Im not seeing anyone Tamaki-senpai." Her voice was small and quiet. Kyouya glance down at her then back at Tamaki.

_Interesting._

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A/N: Ok hope that's an OK chapter for you guys. Please review! :D


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Thanks for reading please enjoy and don't forget to review! Thank you Vampkin for helping me out on the last chapter and pushing on to write antoher :P you annoying child you are helpful lol

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**Chapter 5**

**A Guiding Hand**

Haruhi was arranging flowers for an upcoming host meeting where the theme was spring. She was near the window area and the sun was like a hot shower on her skin. She was pleasantly warm and worked with a light heart.

The flowers Kyouya had chosen were some of her favorite colors. She smiled at it, he was always doing the smallest gestures for her it seemed. A helping hand when she fell physically or emotionally. A brushing of fingers during an annoying day with Tamaki or the others. A sentence laced with secret meanings only she would understand. And now these flowers. She felt as if he'd bought the entire room just for her.

"You're smiling a lot, Haruhi." The small girl jumped when she heard Tamaki's voice behind her. She turned surprised at first but she quickly painted it with anger and turned around again. She was still irked at the host members for butting into her life like they had. And after that scene this morning, they were lucky she'd only stormed off and ignored them all day.

"Is that a crime now too?" Haruhi snapped though she regretted afterwards. She watched Tamaki stand beside her and finger a vase of flowers she'd just finished with. He ran his fingers over the petals and helped a few that had fallen over.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly placing both hands into his pockets. Haruhi looked sideways surprised by the gentleness of his tone.

"You should be." She turned her back on him getting another vase from a box on the floor. She started the process all over again. Tamaki never left waiting it seemed. Finally Haruhi sighed and spoke.

"I know you worry about me, you've been a great friend. But would it really, hypothetically of course, would it really be so terrible if I did have someone over? Don't you think I can handle "seeing" someone if I wanted to?" She asked keeping her voice calm and cool, it was nothing more than a normal conversation between friends.

Tamaki didn't answer right away Haruhi was finally forced to turn to him just to see if he was even there. He was standing in the same position but he'd turned his head to look at her. A smile, a sad one, crossed his face and he looked out towards the window. The sun streamed across his handsome features like a halo of light for a god.

"I care very much Haruhi. It was something surprising that the twins stuck on us suddenly. I simple want what's best for you, and you do tend to make bad choices." He grabbed her shoulder and smiled again. Haruhi's stomach clenched, _oh, no…._Tamaki's eyes were filled with emotion that Haruhi so desperately wanted to wipe clean. "If there was someone you had feelings for, I have no doubt you'd share that information with your friends. We all care about you."

"Haruhi aren't you done yet?" Kyouya appeared by Tamaki's shoulder suddenly and Haruhi leapt under Tamaki's hand. The blond teen looked back with a surprised expression but it was quickly wiped away along with any other emotion that had been in his eyes.

"Don't be so hard on her Kyouya." He laughed slapping his best friend on the back he sauntered off calling to the twins to prepare wardrobes.

"What was that about?" Kyouya asked pretending to inspect her work on the flowers. Haruhi turned her back to him and continued working.

"He apologized for butting into my life." Kyouya chuckled behind her and she felt her eye twitch. Sometimes he could be a real bastard.

"And as for you, what was your part in that about?" She snapped. Seeing the amusement in his eyes had brought a sharp pain to her. Did he enjoy her misery? Her guilt and fear? Sometimes Haruhi just didn't know what she'd gotten herself into. He was the Shadow King, even to his closest friends, how much different could he be around a girlfriend?

"I had to play a part in it Haruhi. You do want to keep this a secret." He pushed the always sliding glasses up his nose. The glare made him look menacing again. Haruhi sighed and wished the Kyouya who held her and kissed her through the night could always be the Kyouya she saw. Not switching between villain and hero randomly.

"Yes, yes." She sighed and continued arranging flowers.

"Do you like the colors?" He asked after a moment of silence. Haruhi felt an unwanted smile tug at her lips and nodded.

"They are very beautiful. I know the girls will love them." She grinned looking back at the boy standing with his notebook open. He was not scribbling in it as he usually was; his eyes were soft behind his glasses watching her with that familiar smile on his lips. She wanted so badly to stand up on her toes and kiss those lips but she just resigned herself to a moment longer of just watching, then she continued her task.

"Take this one, and place it here." He reached for the flower her hand was already closed over and guided her hand to the vase in the place she was about to place it anyway.

"Thank you Senpai, that looks great." He gave her hand a squeeze before nodding and walking away his pen going on his notebook page.

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A/N: Hope you enjoyed this chapter : ) please review it helps me gain confidence and advice for next chapters. I write for you :D thanks again!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N:Hope you enjoy this chapter, please review I need your encouragement to keep going!

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**Chapter 6**

**Lost in thought and kiss**

Kyouya could see it all now. Her reaction, her distress, his coldness, his indifference to the tears rolling down her face. He would have to practice how he'd tell her. How he'd hold her, if he chose to at all. He must have every detail planned out exactly as it should be. Nothing could go wrong here. He must keep himself composed and structured for his. _"Haruhi, this may be hard for you to understand but I'm…."_

"Kyouya? Kyouya come back to me." Kyouya was startled from his thoughts as Haruhi tugged on his sleeve. He was sitting on his couch watching a late night show. She'd chosen to come over to his place tonight since the twins felt like staking out her place all night. She'd just never gone home. Her father knew where she was of course, she was "studying" with Kyouya-Senpai.

"Oh, I'm sorry my dear. What were you saying?" He smiled at her confusion and waited for it to clear from her eyes.

"What were you thinking about?" Haruhi asked her face going a little worried as it pinched together. Kyouya shrugged and chose a more believable topic.

"Money investments I've made." Haruhi rolled her eyes at him turning to watch the show again. Kyouya smiled at her innocence, she bought into everything he said so easily it seemed. He didn't know whether that made her gullible or him a too good of a liar.

"You sure you're ok?" Haruhi asked looking up again. Something about the way his eyes had clouded over made her worry. In the last five months he'd been a ball of sunshine most of the time around her. She'd seen him change from a statue of ice into a warm teddy bear there to make her smile at his silliness and the words that only she ever got to hear. This sudden change in behavior wasn't something she wanted to see.

"Yes, I'm quiet sure. Don't worry about it." He smiled and leaned forward instantly distracting her. Haruhi gave into the kiss unable to tear herself away from the amazing softness of his lips. He caressed them together letting his hand roam down her arm and come to rest on her hip. Haruhi smiled into his kiss and felt his hand squeeze.

"You always know how to distract me." She giggled pulling away from the kiss to look into his eyes again. They were warm and full of love as they returned the glance. He was handsome with the glasses on, but without them sometimes Haruhi just wanted to stare at him forever.

"That I do." He pulled her back to him pulling her across his lap, she blushed at the position of her straddling him but he just kissed her neck and let her relax against him. She let him kiss her a little more passionately all the while her heart fluttered and flopped, skipped and stopped. She wondered if her heart would just give out completely when he was around.

Neither seemed to notice the sound of footsteps in the hall, or the sound of a loud voice protruding through a cell phone. Both were lost in the bliss of one another's company till it was too late.

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A/N: little bit of a cliff hanger. Gimme lots of reviews and I'll see how fast I'll update ;) thanks for reading I love you all! Remember review=fast updates ^^


	8. Chapter 8

A/N:

**Chapter 7**

**Anger**

Haruhi felt Kyouya's hands growing more curious of her soft curves. They ran across her back dipping and spreading to the sides as he reached her hips. He ran his fingers over her sides, sending shivers of delight up her as he did so. Without realizing what she was doing she released his neck and felt him pull her arms up above her head. He held her wrists captive just at the base of her head as he kissed her fiercely. She felt her heart hammering as his other arm wound around her waist and pulled her even closer to his chest. She could literally feel his heart against her.

"Kyouya…." Haruhi said a little breathlessly pulling away from him. He stared at her with beautiful shadowy eyes and released her wrists. She lowered arms back to his shoulders and breathed heavily as they stared at one another. He grabbed her around the waist and turned her suddenly so she was on her back on the couch. He climbed over her, her hands till clung to his shoulders. His hair fell over them slightly and she brushed it back with a smile. He kissed her again lowering some of his weight on her. Haruhi felt herself tense at the suddenness of him above her but she soon relaxed to the gentle rhythm of his lips on hers. His hand cupped the back of her head bringing her even closer to his lips. She hugged him to her loving every second of this bliss. But….what was that noise? The room was completely silent except for them, the TV somehow turned off in the midst of their kissing.

"Wh-What's that sound?" Haruhi broke off the kiss and Kyouya lifted his head just in time to see the bedroom door opening slowly as if the intruder feared an attack, and that's exactly what he got.

"What the hell are you doing barging into my room!" Kyouya jumped off of Haruhi in a flash and slammed against his bedroom door stopping anyone from coming in. Haruhi's face flushed crimson and sat up quickly gathering her jeaned legs around her like she was naked.

"Please calm down Mr. Ootori." Haruhi's face went from bright, bright red to deathly pale.

"Dad!" She jumped to her feet as Kyouya opened the door in equal shock to see Ranka Fujioka standing outside the room holding a cell phone at arm's length. Through it both teens recognized the panicked voice.

"That idiot!" Kyouya snatched the phone up and immediately fell back into Shadow King Role.

"Tamaki what is this about?" Kyouya turned his back on Haruhi and her father and walked further into the room. Haruhi shoved her dad back into the hallway and closed the door behind them.

"What are you doing here?" Haruhi demanded. Her heart was hammering like she'd done the foulest crime ever imagined. Her father just watched her twitch and fidget with tired eyes.

"Your friends called me when they couldn't find you. They were worried something had happened to you. So I told them what you told me, and they said they couldn't get a hold of Kyouya; so I came down to see, with that blonde idiot screaming the entire way. I don't see why you hang around men like him." Haruhi laughed at her father and hugged him tight. He looked so tired; work must have been tough tonight.

"Well thanks for worrying but things are just fine. I'm sure Kyouya-Senpai just didn't hear his phone go off or something." Haruhi felt herself relax as her father talked with her for a few more minutes then left to go back to work.

Haruhi went back into Kyouya's room quietly and the teen boy didn't notice this. His back was to the door but she could see his entire body was rigid. She wondered what Tamaki had said to make him so upset. She started to walk towards him thinking a gentle hug would sooth him.

"Damn you Tamaki!" Kyouya shouted suddenly and flung the cell phone across the room and shattering it against the far wall. Haruhi stopped dead in her tracks flinching back as the phone shattered.

"Kyouya!" Haruhi cried startled by his burst of anger. Kyouya whipped around looking at her if as she'd witnessed him murder someone.

"Haruhi…" His breath escaped all at once and he seemed to cross the room in one big stride.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Don't cry, you're ok." Haruhi hadn't realized she was crying till he began to wipe almost frantically it seemed at her face.

"What is wrong? What did Tamaki-Senapi want?" Haruhi wiggled free from Kyouya going to pick up the pieces of her father's shattered cell phone.

"I'll buy Ranka a new one." He helped collect the pieces avoiding Haruhi's question quiet bluntly.

"Kyouya." She placed her hand on his arm. "What did he say to you?" She stared into his eyes and worried. Kyouya sighed looking away. There was that look. A look of secrets. She knew whatever had been said between the two boys would not be shared with her no matter what she insited on. Kyouya was stubborn when he wanted to be.

"Alright, alright." She finished cleaning up the cell phone bits and threw them away sighing as she did so. Sometimes this relationship seemed more like a war.

"Come sit down with me again." Kyouya held out his hand and Haruhi didn't have the strength to refuse him this.

Haruhi sat with her back to the arm rest leaning against it as Kyouya laid down on her his back to her stomach and his head resting between her breasts. Her arms folded around his head coming to rest on his chest. He looked back at her straining his neck to see her smile as they laid there together.

"What?" Haruhi asked stroking the side of Kyouya's face with her fingers finding little spots of stubble growing in. He didn't answer her, just watched her with those eyes, darker then night and empty. She felt herself start to worry but pushed her fears away content enough with the silence as he titled his head off to rest on one of her arms so he could watch her face.

Time passed slowly and soon enough Kyouya's eyes had fluttered closed on Haruhi's arms and she smiled at the sleeping teen. He looked so peaceful and calm like this. His face was so amazingly smooth. Haruhi sighed and pressed her lips to his forehead. _What are you hiding from me now Kyouya?_

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A/N: There you go; hope the length is a little better please review.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 8**

**What's Going On**

Tamaki put down his cell phone quietly, calmly. He knew it….he just knew it. There was something big going on with Kyouya. Something bigger then he himself could muster up. But what was it? The blond teen strode towards his bed and laid back looking up at the ceiling.

Haruhi was acting stranger and stranger. Kyouya was avoiding him like he carried some dieses. The twins were seeing strange things around Haruhi's apartment. And now, late at night Haruhi's at Kyouya's house, in his private room none the less…..What was going on!

::

Haruhi woke to the sound of Kyouya's voice gently speaking. She opened her eyes in with a fluttering motion just as Kyouya leaned in for a kiss. She smiled as he pulled away, letting out a screech as he suddenly picked her up bridal style.

"Put me down!" she laughed clinging to his neck as he walked around the couch.

"No." Was his simple reply as a handsome smile painted his lips. He seemed overly cheerful suddenly and Haruhi wondered faintly what it was, but her heart was beating too fast to make her wonder anymore as he dropped her down on to his bed.

"What are you doing?" She demanded feeling a blush creep across her face as he stripped off his shirt and climbed in with her.

"I'm going to bed, what are you doing?" He asked propping himself on one elbow holding his head in the palm of his hand. Haruhi laughed and scooted closer as his hand came to rest in the small of her back.

"Shouldn't I be going home?" She asked already getting drowsy again. Kyouya just smiled and shook his head.

"No, stay here with me. I took care of everything." Haruhi watched his eyes seeing something missing from the expression of happiness plastered on his face. His eyes, oh his eyes were so dull.

"Alright I'll stay. I'd rather be here with you then alone anywhere else." She snuggled as close as she could to his chest listening to his heart beat. It was pounding furiously against her face.

"Goodnight Kyouya." She sat up and peaked at his cheek before curling up against his side again. She didn't see his eyes grow a little watery before they closed.

::

Kyouya stood outside the band room doors, waiting for Tamaki to come sauntering down the hall. He was furious still about what had happened on the phone at his house. Tamaki had no right to speak to him that way, to accuse him of such things, even though they were almost all true. Kyouya sighed and removed his glasses. Taking a moment of weakness, he rubbed between his eyes and tried to think through his plan again. He'd confront Tamaki, lay down the rules and actions of what would take place for the next week or so and then he would tell Haruhi. The girl….oh, he hated himself for even getting into this relationship. But he cared to damn much. He wanted to be held, loved like any other person in this world. But he now understood why Ootori's had a hard state of mind and heart. It was the only way to preserve yourself and the ones around you.

Kyouya looked up quickly hearing Tamaki's voice down the hall, but then with a gut clenching realization Kyouya heard another voice. Haruhi's….

"Oh, god." He moaned moving into the room. He hoped that Tamaki wouldn't let his anger from last night spill over into Haruhi's mood today. He'd noticed that after she woke this morning she'd adopted a very cheerful, not like her, mood. She'd held his hand, hugged his body, kissed his cheek and watched him from the corner of her eyes like a hawk. Things were spiraling out of control and he wasn't sure he'd be able to keep things in place.

He wished silently that he'd been smarter five months ago…

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A/N: Please review! :D


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Thanks for reviewing my dear readers. Your comments always make my day and give me that extra boost to keep going. Please enjoy my story and please review at the end. :D

* * *

**Chapter 9**

**Choices**

"And that is all that happened last night?" Haruhi asked suspiciously as Tamaki and she walked down the hall. He'd been waiting for her outside her last class of the day and was now walking her to the host club for duties. He had looked troubled, but soon a sunny smile and cloudy eyes overtook that leaving her to talk to a wall pretty much.

"Of course my dear_, I would not hide things from you_." Haruhi looked up sharply at him as he spoke that. He put a lot of emphasis on the last bit of that sentence. She tried to pry out of him more information about what had been said between the boys but Tamaki would say no more the that Kyouya and him had discussed personal problems the Host Club was facing. Nothing she needs to worry herself with at the moment. Haruhi had a feeling he was holding back much more but let it go as they reached the band room. She was to tired and worried about Kyouya to try and beat it out of Tamaki. She'd just have to talk to Kyouya later.

Haruhi immediately felt Tamaki tense beside her as they walked into the band room. Haruhi could see Kyouya leaning against the far wall; he quickly walked into the back room though when they entered. Haruhi didn't get a chance to go after him because the twins descended on her immediately.

"You never came home last night!"

"Where were you?" Haruhi folded her arms real slowly across her chest and stared the twins down. They blinked surprised by this action and backed up a few paces recognizing the dark aura surrounding the girl.

"Tell me why you were staking out my house!" She blew up and the twins ran as she chased after them calling them names and telling them off about her privacy. Tamaki watched amused by the twins but thankful they'd distracted her. Tamaki made a bee line for the back room.

"Kyouya? I think we need to talk." Tamaki closed the door and just as he turned around he saw a cup come flying at his head. He ducked just in time as the dish shattered over his head.

"You bastard!" Kyouya was fuming in front of him now his hand grabbed Tamaki's collar in a fist. Tamaki glared back at his best friend remembering a time when they had been like this before.

"You have to tell her! Especially after all of the secrets you two have kept from us." Tamaki felt the familiar sting of what he had discovered. For five months, right under their nose those two had been sneaking around. Tamaki was hurt Haruhi would not speak to him of such a huge secret. Kyouya was always one to keep to himself, but it hurt all the same.

Kyouya released his friend and walked away unshaken by further news that Tamaki actually knew about him and Haruhi.

"How did you find out?" Kyouya asked removing his glasses.

"That doesn't really matter now does it Kyouya. The only thing that is important is _what_ I know. You have to tell her, when do you plan on doing it?" Kyouay groaned and rubbed his face.

"I wish I'd never met her." He spat the lie at the wall feeling all the guilt well up inside him. What had he done? He should have never kissed her, kept his distance would have been so much better. Then this would have been easier.

"You know….there is always another option to this." Tamaki placed his hand on his best friends shoulder and felt all his anger pour away. It wasn't Kyouya's fault, or even Haruhi's about how they felt. He had to accept it and help his friend.

"No, no, no, no , no….." Kyouya felt so drained. There was no way he could do the other option. Could he? He worked his whole life to reach this point and Tamaki suggested it was nothing more than a slip of paper, easily shredded and thrown away. But Kyouya knew this opportunity would never come again. There was no way he could just let it slip away…Then with a start Kyouya didn't know what he was talking about anymore.

A love from someone not interested in his money, or status. Or what his father now offered him.

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A/N: Short chapters I know but it just makes it easier to bounce around and explain other things please review!


	11. Chapter 11

_**Chapter 10**_

_**Tears**_

Haruhi finally got her time alone with Kyouya after the host club had left with smiles and promise to check up on her later tonight. She just snorted at them and ignored their suggestive winks and curious thoughts. Tamaki put a hand on her shoulder in a strange way making her wonder what clouded his eyes.

"Call me if you ever need anything." He said almost to softly to hear. Haruhi wondered what he had meant by that, but then again she was in a somewhat pleasant mood.

Kyouya watched from afar for a few minutes as Haruhi straightened up the remains of the clubs activities. She looked so lovely with the afternoon light streaming down on her small petite frame. The way her hair shinned in the natural light the way her face was highlighted in a halo of golden light. She was just so beautiful. With a heavy sigh he picked up his regrets and walked towards the stunning girl who he was about to destroy with simple words.

"How are you feeling?" She asked as he approached quietly. She turned, her face filled with a warm, kind smile as she leaned forward and kissed his cheek fondly. Kyouya felt himself grinning but quickly took control of his…silly emotions and removed it. Haruhi frowned when she saw this and put her hand on his chest.

"What's wrong?" She asked gently, his heart was erratic. Kyouya sighed and took her hand in his.

"Come with me Haruhi, sit down." Haruhi immediately felt her heart constrict and stomach flip over in a painful way. That was never a good thing to say in a relationship.

"What's going on?" She asked worry surrounding her mind. _Is he ok? What does he want to say? Did I do something?_ Thousands of questions wondered through her brain making her palms sweat and breathing come just a little faster than normal. Kyouya didn't look at her as they sat. That only made Haruhi more anxious.

"I have something….difficult to tell you, my dear." His hands squeezed hers and she saw the old Ootori Kyouya appear behind those glasses. The boy who shut everyone out of his heart, refused kindness and love only searching for the merit behind every word.

"I will be…." He felt his constrict on the words painfully. He cleared his throat and forced himself to look at her. Look deep in her eyes and watch her heart break, watch every tear slide down her face, witness what love for one person can do. It would be forever a reminder to remove himself from these types of situations.

"I will be leaving Japan…." The silence was sharp. Kyouya stared at Haruhi. Her face was pale, her eyes were wide and her lips were parted as if she had been about to speak. Nothing came from her; he started to wonder if she was even taking a breath. It looked like she had just simply frozen.

"Haruhi." He shook her a little and that broke all concentration on staying calm she was trying to keep. She pulled her hands from Kyouya almost like a whip and stood backing away like he'd just threatened her life.

"W-what?" She whispered her eyes filling with shocked tears. Her heart was a constant heavy beat and her hands were trembling uncontrollably. _What?_

"Haruhi, now please. Try to remain calm." Kyouya stood up slowly approaching her like she was a rabid dog about to let lose. Haruhi just backed away from him shaking her head slowly. It felt like her heart was being ripped out. It hurt…_so bad_.

"I will be going to America. To run a business corporation for my father…..It's once in a life time offer. I couldn't refuse him." Kyouya's words felt like a slap to her face. He cared so little about her? He was willing to just walk away from the last five months? How long had he known? When would he be leaving?...

"Haruhi!" She heard his voice go real slow and his movements blurred together. Then suddenly everything around her went dark and she fell into a dark abyss of pain.

::

Kyouya stood over Haruhi's still form trying to wake her. He felt a burning in his eyes and realized horrified that he had tears in his eyes. _Damn it._ He swore silently picking up the fragile girls form into his arms and carrying her to the couch. He left for a moment to get a cold cloth to place on her.

"Damn it. Damn it!" He lost all control in the back room and began to hit the wall, throw dishes and cups till the back room looked as if a tornado had rushed through the place. Kyouya collapsed panting into the middle of the room. _Why, why did he do this to himself and her!_ He wanted to kick himself but instead slammed his fist down into a pile of broken dishes. His had instantly screamed out in agony but he ignored it what hurt more was the cold sensation of water falling down his face.

Tears

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A/N: Ok short I Know but I wanted to be a little short chapter please review my lovely readers.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 11**

**The Mistakes We Make**

A sudden crash sent Haruhi's body bolt upright. Looking around her she found that she was lying on the couch in the host club. Slowly she remembered who she had been talking to before she passed out. Kyouya…. She heard another sound, and immediately jumped to her feet searching for the sound of distress. Where had Kyouya gone? He hadn't left had he? Her heart screamed in fear at that.

Haruhi walked into a scene she would never forget for the rest of her life, and far beyond it. Kyouya, her dear Kyouya Ootori crumpled in the middle of the floor. His hand cut and bleeding out around him. His head was lowered into his knees hiding whatever expression he wore. Tears welled into Haruhi's eyes and she covered her mouth but she couldn't turn away in time.

Kyouya's head rose up from his knees and the sight of tears rolling down his face plummeted Haruhi to her knees. His beautiful black eyes were rimmed with red that seared his sense, his eyes felt heavy and swollen as he looked up at the girl standing in the door way who had just fallen to her knees.

"Oh, Kyouya…." Haruhi moaned cupping her mouth and turning away from the sight. She couldn't bear to see him like that. Kyouya felt his heart constrict with her pain but he could not make himself move to her. He would not put on more strain on this already painful relationship. But Haruhi had no such pretenses. She crawled through the broken glasses and plates and pulled Kyouya to her chest like a mother would to a small child. Kyouya's arms wrapped around her tiny, shaking, body and squeezed her tight to him. His face nestled between her breasts listening to the sound of her frantic hear beat. He hated himself more than he ever could or ever would. He had shattered this girl, and in the process shattered himself. Silence stretched between them and Kyouya's hand began to throb in agony, he let it though, not attempting to remove the shards of glass or bandage it in any way, he deserved this pain.

"When…..When are you going to be leaving, Kyouya?" Haruhi's words barely were heard in the silence that screamed all around them. Kyouya's eyes felt raw, and he felt small and weak. What had he become? When had he become so weak? Haruhi now held the burden of being the strong one. She was absently stroking the side of his face combing his hair with the tips of fingers but her eyes were staring far away into a world he could not follow.

Kyouya sat up pulling away from her embrace; it felt like he was peeling off a second skin. Haruhi's eyes were full of tears and they slowly fell over as he pulled away. Her eyes fell onto the damaged hand and whimpered closing her eyes yet again to hide the damage from view.

"Tonight."

::

Tamaki looked up as a knock interrupted the quietness of his room. He placed the new volume of piano music down on his bed and walked to answer the door. _Who could be bothering him now?_

"Sir someone's here to see you." A maid was waiting outside the door her hands clasped together in her lap. The woman's eyes flashed sideways with a wary expression. Tamaki nodded and was surprised to see Kyouya….carrying Haruhi in his arms. She was so pale and limp in the teens arms.

"What happened to her!" Tamaki yelped quickly getting the two into the room.

"Please call the doctor, bring me …."

"No." Kyouya quickly cut off Tamaki and walked to the bed. "She doesn't need a doctor." He laid the girl quietly on the bed brushing back her hair fondly, sadly. Tamaki quickly waved the maid off and went to the bed where Haruhi was breathing slowly, evenly….She was asleep. He let out a relieved sigh.

"What happened?" Tamaki asked again feeling angst for what she was feeling. If only he could have taken all that pain away. He knew Haruhi would take such news hard, but this went beyond a typical boyfriend girlfriend relationship reaction. There was something much deeper driving Haruhi.

"She passed out….again." Kyouya sat right down on the floor by the bed, his back to his sleeping beauty. His knees supported his arms and he buried his face into his palms. Tamaki's heart went out to Kyouya right then. How his friend must hurt.

"Again?" Tamaki looked again at the girl and sighed. She was so fragile.

"Will you take care of her? Make sure she's taken care of while….when I'm gone." Kyouya asked looking up with watery eyes at his best friend. Tamaki had never seen Kyouya so broken like this. He'd always been the strong one, who could hold up any burden take on any character to make things go smoothly for others. To see him like this now, Tamaki would have walked across the universe to make him at least a little at peace with this choice.

"You know I will, Kyouya." Tamaki kneeled down to eye level with his friend. It tore at him to see the redness in the boy's eyes. He was too young to fill such pain as this.

"Thank you." Kyouya lowered his head down again in defeat. Tamaki nodded and stood feeling it a good time to give Kyouya time with Haruhi. Tamaki knew Kyouya's departure time, it was rapidly approaching. If only Kyouya could realize he didn't have to leave.

"I'll be back in a few minutes." Tamaki left the room leaving Kyouya alone with Haruhi's sleeping body.

Kyouya waited for what seemed like a lifetime to move. He turned around climbing on to the bed sitting beside her. He sat right next to her legs and leaned across her torso supporting himself with one hand as he gazed over her angelic face.

"Oh, Haruhi." He started in a quiet whisper. "I wish I could change all of this. I hate to see you hurt. I'm sorry I ever did this in the first place, but I want you to know this…." Kyouya's voice sounded chocked and strained and he tried furiously to regain control of himself. He was stronger than this, he had to be. How could he ever walk away from her if he couldn't control his own emotions.

"I want you to know that I love you." He stroked her face with his hand and smiled at the beauty of her sleeping face. "I love you so much; I want to thank you for all the nights you were curled against me, giving me the love I never knew could exist. I want to thank you for just being you, for believing in me. You have given me gifts in life I could never repay you." Tears fell onto her face and he quickly wiped away the foolish things.

"Goodbye my dear love." Kyouya leaned over and kissed Haruhi's sweet soft lips. He lingered there missing her already. He half wished she would wake up and keep him by her side but she never stirred. Not as he stood, not as he walked away. Haruhi didn't move a muscle as Kyouya packed his bags and prepared to catch his flight away from Japan.

Away from the only good thing that truly happened in his life.

Haruhi didn't stir a muscle till the morning sun rose across the horizon and kissed her skin good morning. She stretched out her hand patting the bed beside her, searching for Kyouya's warmth. She'd had a terrible dream. He'd tried to leave Japan, leave her behind. He'd proven to her that she was nothing more then...then a good time. Someone to use and throw away. He'd never do that though, she'd prove it when she opened her eyes. He'd be there with a smile and a kiss awaiting her. He'd smooth back her hair and tell her it was just a bad dream.

When she couldn't find him and her eyes found Tamaki's room surrounding her, nothing could have contained her screams.

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A/N: Sorry for such sadness people but it's how it goes. Please review!


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 12**

**The Morning**

Days passed and soon a week had gone by, then two. A month and still Haruhi hardly left bed and hardly ate. Her father was desperate to fix his daughter, to feed her and find some sort of way to cleanse her pain, but nothing ever worked. Finally Ranka had left his darling daughter in the protection and care of Tamaki. Much to his dislike but he knew if anyone could heal Haruhi's broken heart, it would be that tall blond idiot.

::

That morning was no different than any other day had been for the past month. Haruhi was curled into the sheets of her large, over fluffy bed. Her body was thin and fragile. As Tamaki came into the room another full tray of breakfast, he saw how pale her skin was in the early morning light. Every day since she'd been here he'd brought her a tray of food for all the main meals, but she never ate more than a bite or two.

"Haruhi, my dear. It's time for breakfast." Tamaki walked across the room making sure to keep the air around him cheerful and light. Maybe his mood would be contagious. The girl didn't stir at the sound of his voice, or even when he set the tray on a table near the bed and tried to rouse her from bed. As Tamaki neared he saw her breathing was coming in slow pants and her fingers were twitching.

"Oh, Haruhi." Tamaki reached out and stroked her hair back from her face. Another nightmare was plaguing her. "Wake up my dear." He shook her shoulder gently but not gently enough it seemed. She let out a terrified screech and leapt up from her curled position. Tamaki quickly recognized what was about to happen and latched onto her around the waist as she tried to flee from the bed. Everytime she had a nightmare like this and was woken up by someone she would scream bloody murder and try to run away. Today seemed no different.

"Haruhi, Haruhi. Calm down." Tamaki tried desperately to hold her down. She was surprisingly strong during her attempts of flight.

Finally he managed to calm her down enough to have her face pressed right against his chest and know he didn't have to practically strangle her now. He felt sobs shake her body and then she was still, as she always after an episode. She was still, quiet almost like a ghost. A shell of something former. Tamaki sighed softly and pushed her away.

"Here, eat my dear." He sat her up on the bed and brought her the tray of food. It was all her favorites, warm and steamy with warm smells. She watched him move around her absently. Her eyes hollow and much too large for her face now it seemed.

"Eat, Haruhi." He began to feed her and was pleasantly surprised to find that she ate a few more bites than normal.

"I can do it, Senpai." Tamaki nearly dropped the chopsticks when Haruhi spoke. She took the utensils from him and took small bites of the food. Tamaki sat there stunned as she cleaned all the dishes and finally pushed away the tray quietly.

"Thank you, Senpai. I'd like to take a shower now, and to get dressed." Haruhi stared down at her tray but Tamaki leapt to his feet and hurriedly got clothes and washing things for Haruhi.

_Could this be it? _Tamaki thought quickly running through the house attempting to get her dressed and clean before she changed her mind and hid away in despair again.

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**A/N: Thanks for reading my dear readers :) i'm having a bit of writers block so if anyone has some suggestions, or preditions i'd love to hear them Please review! :D**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Ok hope you like this chapter Please review!**

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**Chapter 13**

**Pain**

Kyouya had never known pain like this before. The sharp stabbing that constantly ate at his heart and soul. Every day he woke to the harsh light eating away at his eyes. His body felt weak and heavy as he walked from room to room working, calling people and doing other misalliance things for the new company he found himself in charge of. He thought that this would be the perfect distraction from memebering. And it was, it was an amazing time consuming distraction, but nothing could ever distract him from the cold empty place beside him as he slept, or the face and voice that haunted his dreams. Sometimes even her screams would creep up late at night.

Kyouya woke up that morning like any morning since he'd left behind Japan, the host club….and Haruhi. His eyes stung with the light, his chest ached and his limbs were like thousand pound weights. And of course he always would struggle from the sheets where he'd tossed and turned with troubled dreams and memories of Haruhi. He could almost constantly hear the sobs, the screams and the silence of her pain as he walked from his bed to his bathroom. He showered away the aches and pain as best he could and dressed for the day.

That morning was like no other, or so he thought.

::

Haruhi could all but sense Tamaki pacing outside her bedroom door. She half smirked at the kindness of the fact, but her other half was still frozen in a hell no one could possibly understand. Haruhi stepped from the shower but kept it running freely leaving it to steam up the bathroom. She wrapped herself in a towel and wiped away the fog on the mirror.

The person staring back at her horrified her, but she nearly stared for a moment at the gauntness of her face, the pale deathly pasty way her skin hung to the bones and the dark sleepless bags hanging down her red rimmed eyes.

Quietly opening the bathroom door she crept out into the bedroom and looked around. The curtains were parted slightly but not enough to make the room feel alive. Maybe that's where all her warmth had gone. She flung open the curtains and waited for the sunlight to be absorbed into her wet skin. But nothing happened she felt as cold as ever.

Haruhi felt desperation creeping up into her soul again. What could she do to make all this…pain go away? She wanted so badly to look into Kyouya's eyes and see him looking back with that kind love she knew he held for her. Not those eyes full of regret and disgust. Not the eyes he'd left her staring into. She wanted him to hold her in his arms and kiss her head when she was mad, wanted him here so badly.

"Oh, you rich bastard. Why did you have to leave?" Haruhi sobbed slamming her fist into the window. It shattered suddenly under the force of her despair and Haruhi bit back a cry as glass shattered into her hand. She held the bleeding hand carefully and stumbled back to the bathroom.

"Ow, ow…" She hissed patting it with a damp towel. She opened the medicine cabinet and her eyes instantly stilled on a bottle of pain killers. Her heart began to race.

::

Tamaki heard the shatter of glass and stopped his pacing suddenly. He waited trying to hear something more but he didn't hear another sound. He opened the bedroom door and saw it was filled with warm morning sunshine. He smiled thinking perhaps Haruhi had finished her shower, but he could still hear the shower running. Why would she have open the curtains?

"Oh my god." Tamaki suddenly saw the broken glass and trail of blood leading into the bathroom.

"Haruhi?" Tamaki called frozen in horror at what had seemingly accord. He heard a thunk as if something heavy had just been dropped.

"Haruhi!" Tamaki cried rushing to the bathroom. He found Haruhi unconscious on the bathroom floor her hand bleeding out above her head where it fallen. It made a halo of blood around her crown.

"Oh my god!"

::

Kyouya stared as his phone as Tamaki's number flashed on the screen. He hesitated, not wanting to hear another update that Haruhi had not left bed, she'd had another nightmare, and it was his entire fault for her condition. Kyouya didn't answer it and the screen went blank. He stared down at it then turned off his brain and went back to work that was spread out around his desk. He would not let Japan worry him anymore.

Then suddenly the phone went off again. Kyouya took off his glasses and leaned back in his chair staring at the phone as it buzzed across the smooth wood of his desk. It stopped ringing again and Kyouya just stared waiting to see what would happen next. When it went off for a third time Kyouya could not ignore it.

"Hello?" Kyouya answered uncaringly trying to sound uncaring of the call.

"Why the hell didn't you answer!" The panic in Tamkai's voice set Kyouya on high alert.

"I was busy." He lied quickly holding the phone to his head to the point he would cause himself a headache sooner or later.

"Its Haruhi…." Tamaki's voice suddenly got quiet and choked. Kyouya's heart began to race in utter panic. What had that stupid girl done!

"What is it? What happened?" KYouya stood from his chair slowly and walked towards the windows that overlooked the town he'd abandoned Haruhi for.

"She's….." Tamaki broke off for a second and it took all Kyouya's strength not to scream at the teen.

"She's taken a bottle of pain killers. The doctors don't know if she's going to pull through it."

"Kyouya? Kyouya?" The other end of the phone was dead silent. Kyouya's eyes were frozen ten times their normal size staring out at nothing. He could see it all in his head, replaying over and over again. A silent Haruhi laying unconscious on a hospital bed. Tubes and other devices protruding from her lovely body. Her heart's monitor beeping slowly, weakly.

Then slowly it goes flat…


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Hope you enjoy this chapter, I kinda did writing it ^^ haha Please review my wonderful faithful readers :D**

* * *

**Chapter 14**

**Faults**

The room was silent, not a sound was heard. Kyouya walked down the silent isle, every ones head was bowed down in respect to the deceased. His feet seemed loud against the carpet as he made his way to the casket. Kyouya laid his hand against the cold flesh of Haruhi's gray skin. He shivered but not from her skin but from the disgust he felt inside for causing this. He couldn't believe that he'd driven her to such extremes. He stared down at her peaceful face framed with white lace from the soft pillow beneath her head.

"_This is your fault_!" Kyouya flinched as the corpse turned her beautiful head and screeched those words at him. Her hand shot out and grasped his wrist in a painful grip. "_Why did you leave me, why didn't you tell me_?" Kyouya clamped his hands down on his ears but still Haruhi's dead words flew through his fingers and into his brain.

"_You killed me_!" She screamed a sound so unnatural it made the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. Then as if she'd never moved she was laying peacefully there again her face calm serene in death. Her hair was pinned back in her favorite fashion, her hands folded neatly on her stomach. The dress Tamaki had for her was beautiful, but still all the way Haruhi. She was so very beautiful still, even death he felt his heart accelerate. All the memories they'd shared, all the times they'd spent together. The adrenaline from nearly being caught kissing in a corner, to the sheer pleasure of one slight touch from the other. All those sleepless nights they'd spent together talking till dawn came.

All of those wonderful things and Kyouya threw them all away without a second's hesitation. Was he really that much of a lap dog for his father?

::

::

"Mr. Ootori!" the boy jumped from his seat and nearly toppled out on to the floor. He looked up ragged at the stewardess fussing above him spewing apologies like a water fountain. Kyouya waved her off of him and took a moment to regain his composer.

"What is it?" Kyouya tried to keep from snapping at the woman but from the hurt expression he knew he failed.

"We'll be arriving momentarily. There is a man named Tamaki awaiting you at the airport." Kyouya nodded and the woman scurried away quickly, glad to be rid of him he was sure.

Kyouya's heart was still pounding painfully against his chest as he saw Japan spreading out in his visions. All the familiar sights and sounds would soon be rushing up to meet him. What he didn't expect was a warm welcome from Tamaki, and sure enough he didn't get one.

Tamaki was pacing by the door of his limo as Kyouya stepped of his private jet. His steps were calm and collected as if this was nothing more than a business meeting between old friends.

"Tamaki." Kyouya acknowledged the tall teen. He noticed right away the haggared and ill kept way Tamaki looked. His eyes were wild almost crazy, rimmed with sleepless hours and many cups of coffee. Commoner he assumed. His cloths were thrown on quickly and had several stains across the jacket. Tamaki probably hadn't changed in the last two days.

"Get in the car, I don't like being gone for this long. I promised she wouldn't die alone." Tamaki snapped his voice a whip across Kyouya's face. Kyouya barely had time to close the door before the driver sped off towards the hospital that held a dying Haruhi.

"How is she?" Kyouya thought he was being talk to but when he looked Tamaki was on a cell, and by the sound on the other end the twins were watching over Haruhi now.

"Good, good. Yes. We'll be there soon." Silence.

"How is she doing?" Kyouya asked his voice amazingly calm and collected. He felt pain, he felt panic and concern and a million other things but he'd be trained to well to let it show, and the month he spent away from the only real person he ever cared about had all but numbed his face and eyes to any sort of expression but anger.

"How is she? How is she?" Kyouya was surprised by the amount of venom in Tamaki's voice. "She chugged a bottle of pain killers, she didn't get them all before she passed out, she must have taken them one by one." Tamaki turned his red eyes on Kyouya. "She's in a coma apparently. Her vitals are all dependent on the machines and the doctors are skeptical she'll come out of it." Tamaki glared at Kyouya and then turned away abruptly.

"They say….she has no will to go on. They think her hearts going to give out first." Tamaki turned his face even further away and Kyouya suspected tears were falling from his blue eyes.

"Well of course she has no will to go on. If she'd had will she wouldn't have tried to kill herself." Kyouya never saw Tamaki move but suddenly Kyouya was on the floor of the limo his nose was bleeding and Tamaki was on top of him.

::

::

"Wow what happened to you two?" Kyouya and Tamaki stumbled out of the limo as they finally reached the hospital. The twins were waiting outside for them and what they saw had both of them practically speechless.

Tamki's face was smeared with a streak of blood, his lip was swollen and the sleeve to his jacket was torn clear off. KYouya had a blood nose, a fat lip and a cut just under his eye. He simply was straightened his cracked glasses and stomped pass the twins without a word.


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Sorry for delays have been pretty busy lately**

* * *

**Chapter 15**

**Dark and Light**

Haruhi felt coldness creeping across her toes and wiggled them trying to keep warm as she sat alone on a hard cold floor surrounded by darkness. A light was lit above her making a perfect circle around her frame. She sat with her legs pulled under her chin. Her hair was shadowy over her eyes, but the gaps left the perfect view for Kyouya to be seen sitting across from her in a comfy plush chair with a similar light surrounding him. His face was hard and cold, the light was reflecting off his glasses to an almost blinding glow. Neither had spoken since Haruhi had woken up in this dark place.

It frightened her to be in this place but for some reason she felt like this was better than…wherever she'd been before. Her mind was foggy and sometimes she could hear quiet voices in the dark. And sometimes she felt as if they were calling to her. But nothing more would come to her. She felt at peace here somehow. She was confused about the entire situation.

"Do you know why you are here?" His voice boomed out into the darkness and Haruhi jumped in surprise. Her fingers slipped from the frame of light and she cried out in pain as they were chilled. She quickly pulled them back tears welling in her eyes.

"No, no I don't!" She shouted at him cradling her near frozen fingers to her chest. She felt hopeless and desperate, and she didn't know why. So add frustration and anger into that equation.

"You are here because you chose to be here. You wanted the pain to go away. And here you will have none." His hand swept across the dark empty void. He leaned forward a sinister smile crossing his features suddenly.

"You chose to stay here with me." His hand outstretched and Haruhi felt her own hand lifting from the safety of the light to reach for his hand. He was so close she just had to take in the pain and cross over to him. Where she could be with him…..forever. She wanted to be with him so very badly. She felt rushing memories of happy smiles and laughter that filled the small room.

"Kyouya…."

* * *

Kyouya could safely say he was pissed beyond belief. He couldn't believe Tamaki had attacked him in the limo. But then again, he knew he deserved it. He just couldn't put out the proper words or emotions for what he was feeling. Haruhi near death? He was a complete wreck, but of course he was more inclined to stay calm and cool then let anyone know that. It was just the Ootori way, and few can deny their nature. He wiped some blood away from his face and kept walking down the hall with a dark aura around him threatening even the sweetest nurse with a glare meant to kill.

After getting the room Haruhi was staying in he set out to find it. His mood was dark all the way down the hall. He wondered what she'd look like when he saw her laying there, motionless and quiet. Would it be like the screaming corpse he'd dreamt about? Or would she seem nothing more than that sleeping angel he'd held so many nights.

"Hurry she's going into shock! Get the adreline ready, her hearts giving out!" Kyouya froze as he neared the room Haruhi was staying in. _Oh, god No!_ He raced down the hall and found doctors and nurses pouring into Haruhi's room.

Then he heard a horrific sound.

"She's flat lined!"

* * *

Haruhi stopped her out reach for Kyouya's hands and sat back into the safety of her circle. She saw his face crinkle in disappointment.

"Haruhi, this is what you wanted. You wanted to be with me." He stretched out both his hands the finger tips disappearing into the darkness. Haruhi saw no flinch of pain in his eyes, so she began to trust in him.

"But, it hurts Kyouya. It hurts to be in the dark. Can't you come to me?" Her eyes welled with tears and she felt like she'd become a small child desperate to have her mother around her again.

"No I can't Haruhi, you have to come to me. That's why you took those pills." Haruhi lifted her head and looked across the dark at him.

"Pills?" Something….something painful began to tug at her heart.

"At Tamaki's house, you missed me. This was the quickest way to get what you wanted." He stood abruptly and his arms disappeared into the darkness. The glow of his glasses only seemed to intensify. "Now, take my hand you silly girl. I want a hug." His smile brought a rush of feelings to Haruhi and she stood as he did.

"Oh Kyouya." She reached out into the darkness and cried as it began to sting her warm flesh.

"Almost there, dear." He encouraged her to cross the dark and as she began to leave her circle of light she saw him being swallowed by darkness. Her heart began to speed up to intense, painful speeds. She cried out again one hand clenching at her chest. Her heart it hurt so badly.

"Haruhi, please come to me." Kyouya was whispering now and Haruhi lifted her face ready to be swallowed in the darkness to get to him.

"Haruhi no!" She gasped at the feeling of something pulling her back into the light. She tried to struggle against the sound that was pulling her backwards but it was useless. It sounded familiar and desperate. _Tamaki…._

She turned her eyes and screamed at the image of Kyouya disappearing into the abyss.

* * *

Kyouya rocked back and forth from the sudden impact of Tamaki running down the hall and shoving him aside as he rammed himself into the room and grabbed Haruhi's hands somehow shoving past the nurses and doctors.

"Haruhi no!" Tamaki shouted tear streaming down his face and he clung to the girl. The doctors couldn't wrestle him aside and worked around him to restart Haruhi's heart. Kyouya stared into the room his entire body feeling weak.

"Oh god Haruhi!" Tamaki cried dropping his head down on to her stomach as her heart began a slow, steady beat again. Kyouya's eyes stared at the deep chocolate eyes that opened up suddenly. They stared at him with the greatest sorrow and pain he'd ever seen. But there was a soft tenderness glowing deep within the pain. She was happy he was there….he could hardly believe it.

"Haruhi…." Kyouya whispered as her eyes closed shut again.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 16**

**Whatever it takes**

Tamaki paced the hallways eager to get back into Haruhi's room and see how she was doing. Kyouya had forcefully removed Tamaki from the room after the doctors wanted to check over her vitals and other conditions. She seemed to be sleeping from what he'd heard, hopefully it wasn't another coma.

"Damn you." Tamaki slammed his fist into the wall across from Haruhi's room, the pain was nothing to what he felt in his stomach. Fear.

Kyouya had gone into the now eerily quiet room nearly twenty minutes ago and Tamaki had been locked out with a harsh glare and snap of the lock. Tamaki knew this would be an important moment in Haruhi's recovery or her death. Tamaki was just anxious to know his sweet flower would be alright. That Kyouya wouldn't poison her anymore than he already had.

Tamaki had never felt such disgust and hatred for one person in his life, worse he felt sorry for his best friend. Kyouya had had his sympathy at first for the hard choice and the heartache he knew he felt, but now Tamaki blamed Kyouya for this all. If he'd been honest with Haruhi from the start about his trip she wouldn't have taken it so hard, she would have understood and encouraged him to go, that's just how Haruhi was. She'd have sent him off with a smile and kiss of good luck, not try and send herself up with tears and a bottle of pills. But no, he'd sprung it upon her suddenly and abandoned her….just like her mother in some ways. Haruhi must have felt abandoned by the only other creature she loved more than her father. The one person who'd held her at nights and whispered comforts and advice to her about school and life. Kyouya had been a part of Haruhi's heart and he'd just walked out like she was nothing more than a one night stand.

Tamaki cursed and slipped down to sit beside the hospital room waiting for Kyouya to come out.

::

Kyouya lifted his dark eyes for the hundredth time but Haruhi's were still locked close tight. Her heart monitor beeped painfully slow and her breathing was labored, the little oxygen that was being pumped into her nose seemed like the only thing that kept her breathing. His hands were clasped between his knees and head bent as if in prayer. Kyouya didn't feel he had the right to hold her hand and coax her from her slumber. Tears that were never to be spilled burned at the back of his eyes.

"Oh, what have I done Haruhi? What have you done?" He asked harshness eroding the lining of his voice. He knew this was his fault, but he'd always assumed Haruhi was stronger than this. That she could overcome any obstacle placed in her way, even a broken heart. He'd never realized the depths of her feelings for him, or his for her.

The thought of how close she'd been to death, and just feet from him. He was sure he'd die if she ever was taken from him again. He'd made a terrible mistake, and he intended to make up for that in any way he felt necessary.

::

"Get away from me you bastard!" Tamaki leapt to his feet when he heard Haruhi screech suddenly. Rushing into her hospital room he saw that she was pressed up onto her pillows her eyes daggers cast directly at a shocked Kyouya who appeared to have fallen to the floor. His hands were splayed on the floor as if trying to grip them for support. His glasses were on the floor behind him as if she'd struck him.

"Get away from me Kyouya! I hate you!"


	18. Chapter 18

A/N: Thanks for being so patient with me these last few weeks. I've just been busy and tired as all hell :P Please enjoy my story :) I love you my faithful readers!

* * *

**Chapter 17**

**Hate**

Tamaki didn't even give himself time to think of what had happened before he was reaching down to drag his best friend from the room. Haruhi's raging voice following as the two boys stumbled out of the room. Doctors and nurses poured back into Haruhi's room and quickly her enraged voice became quiet and Tamaki heard the distant sound of sobbing as he dragged Kyouya down the hall.

"What the hell did you say to her!" Tamaki tried to keep his voice calm but he was itching to get back to Haruhi and protect her from….everything now it seemed. Kyouya looked terrible, his face was pale and his eyes were dark and lifeless.

"I didn't say anything, she just opened her eyes….and started screaming…" Kyouya whispered confusion lining his voice as it floated between his lips. Tamaki let his friend slump to the floor and ran a hand through his unwashed hair. _Haruhi? What are you thinking right now?_ Tamaki wondered seeing the clear devastation that was his friend sitting on the polished floors of the hospital.

"I'll go get your glasses. Stay here Kyouya." Tamaki ordered turning on his heel and walked briskly down the hallway. Kyouya didn't even seem to notice the sudden absence he just babbled under his breath receiving worried looks from passing nurses.

::

Tamaki arrived back at Haruhi's room to find the area quiet except for a few voices with in the room. He walked in hoping to find Haruhi comfortable and calm, and was relieved to see it so. Karou and Hikaru were gathered around her bed each holding one of her hands.

"Are you feeling better?"

"Do you need anything?" The chimed one right after the other. Haruhi shook her head giving them appreciative smiles. If he hadn't known better he never would have guessed she'd been a rage not five minutes ago.

"Haruhi, my dear. Are you alright?" Tamaki asked giving her a knowing look when her eyes swiveled to him standing in the door way.

"You know what, I could use something to eat and drink, do you mind?" She asked giving each twin a smile of perfect manipulation. She seemed to have learned a few tricks from Kyouya. The twins immediately left and rushed down to the cafeteria.

"They don't know what happened do they?" Her voice was cold, her eyes narrowed at Tamaki like he was the enemy. Tamaki choose to meet her glare and walked to grasp her hand. He cupped her small fragile fingers and let his lips touch them.

"I didn't tell anyone about you and Kyouya," she flinched at that, "and I didn't tell them how you got into this coma."

"Coma!" She screeched ripping her hand free from his. "How long have I been in a coma!"

"Haruhi, calm down. Its alright." Tamaki cupped her face with his hands and felt the tears pool at the side of his eyes. She watched this and her own tears started to form.

"Oh, god Tamaki. I'm so sorry for what I did. I just didn't know what else to do. I wanted out of this place. I wanted him….I wanted him back so badly." She sobbed against his chest letting his arms snake around her to squeeze her as close to him as possible. Tamaki felt his heart tremble and crack for her pain. He wanted to punch Kyouya in the face….again. But he knew that was not his choice to make anymore. Everything now depended on keeping Haruhi alive and happy. That's all he cared about now.

::

Kyouya sat against the wall his hands trembling as he thought of what had happened. About what she'd said.

_"Get away from me Kyouya! I hate you!"_ Her words screamed through his memories constantly. He'd been sitting here in a daze for a good hour. Tamaki had never returned with his glasses, but that didn't matter to him. He wanted to stay her, to wallow in self pity. He hated himself as much as Haruhi must. But what could he possibly do to make it up to her.

He loved her. He loved her so damn much, but not enough to stay with her? He thought bitterly snarling at his reflection in the floor tiles. Apparently not.

He knew what he had to do now. He had to put every ounce of his strength into making things better. To fix what he'd almost killed. He had to get Haruhi back, and if he did, if she ever accepted his love again, he promised himself he'd never leave her side again.

_But what if you are rejected, what if she doesn't want you anymore?_ His mind whispered venomously into his mind.

If that was the case then Kyouya would have no choice but to grant her wish and have her happy. He'd leave her side and never ever return. All he wanted now as for her to be happy and to smile. He realized what a huge mistake he'd made, and he was going to fix it now. No matter what.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 18**

**Forgiveness**

Tamaki sat with Haruhi all night long till he was nearly falling asleep next to her bed. He finally decied haruhi would be sound asleep even if he disappeared for a few moments. Kyouya never appeared after Haruhi had awoken that first time and when Haruhi was fast asleep and her breathing was healthy he went searching for his friend. Tamaki eventually found Kyouya staring out the windows down the hall from Haruhi's room.

"Kyouya?" Tamaki called a few feet from the tall teen. Turning Kyouya's eyes were shown to be dark, shadowed under and heavy with guilt and despair. _Good,_ Tamaki thought, but felt guilty himself afterwards. Kyouya's hands were slid into the pockets of his business suit, the jacket gone, and the tie unwound with the first top button undone.

"How is she doing?" His voice was soft and hollow. Tamaki walked to him and extended the boys glasses. Kyouya took them and slid them coolly onto his face making him go from ragged teen, to upset business man.

"She's asleep at the moment." It was all Tamaki was willing to give out since Kyouya hadn't found it nesscassry to come and see for himself.

"I don't think she would have been accepting if I'd returned. Do you think she'll be more receiving in the morning?" Kyouya asked staring out into the busy city. The lights swarmed together in colored blurs across the landscape.

"I'm not quite sure how she'll take you period." Tamaki said bluntly watching the flinch in Kyouya's body.

"What do you mean?" Pain was laced through those words. Tamaki didn't back down though, he was angry and it was mostly at Kyouya.

"She had a dream of sorts when she was on the edge of death back then. She was sitting alone in a circle of light and a gap was between her and….you." Kyouya turned with wide eyes to Tamaki. Listening intently. "She said that you were coaxing her to come and be with you forever in that darkness. But when she stepped out of the light it hurt and you told her it would be fine." Tamaki felt his anger rise as he felt fear for what might have happened.

"She said she heard my voice and when I rushed in while she was flat lining I pulled her back into the light and saved her….I saved her from you!" Tamaki was trembling now and looked away from the tears behind Kyouya's glasses. They both stared at things other than each other for a while.

"I love her Tamaki. I won't lose her again. I'll do whatever it takes to keep her." A dangerous, almost ferial glimmer appeared in the young man's eyes. Tamaki realized he'd have his work cut out for him.

"Why couldn't you have realized that earlier, you idiot!" Tamaki spat leaning against the window. Kyouya brushed off the anger and stared out the window.

"Isn't enough that I've realized it at all?" Kyouya questioned quietly, it didn't seem like he was directing it at Tamaki but he answered anyway.

"I'm not the one to judge that Kyouya. It's in Haruhi's hands whether or not forgiveness is to be handed out here." Tamaki laid his hand on Kyouya's shoulder and gave it a good squeeze.

"I'll let you know when, or if she's willing to see you." Then the tall blonde walked away itching to be there when Haruhi woke.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 19**

**Thank You**

Haruhi felt the soft snuggle of the hospital pillows against her face as she woke from a drug induced sleep. She creaked her eyes open peaking at the sights around her. She found, to her amusement, Tamaki curled tightly into a small chair where his frame surely didn't fit. His blonde hair was strewn across his head one way and then the other. His mouth was wide open and a god awful sound was coming through his nose.

"Tamaki-Senpai." She whispered, but the boy jolted awake like she'd screamed in his ear. Instantly he was hovering over her with a slight case of morning breath.

"Are you alright? Do you need the doctor? Nurse? Twins?" Haruhi giggled and he stopped immediately a smile lining his face.

"There's my Haruhi." He reached out and lifted her chin up with his index finger and smiled at her pale features.

::

Haruhi sat comfortably in the back of Tamaki's limo. She'd been released from the hospital and agreed with her father, and Tamaki, that she would stay with Tamaki for a while till she felt 100 percent better.

"Not to cold?" Tamaki asked penetrating Haruhi's wondering thoughts. She turned to him her eyes a bit to flat for his liking but her smile warm enough to relieve him.

"No, no I'm fine thank you." Tamaki nodded to her. Her attitude sure seemed to have done a 180, but her eyes. The way she looked at things, the way she just zoned out, he still worried about her constantly.

"Let me get that for you my dear." Tamaki rushed to take her bags from her when they reached the mansion. Haruhi laughed lightly as he rang a little bell and butlers came to take her bags. She thanked them sweetly snatching one bag before Tamaki could have it sent off. It felt good to have weight on her shoulders, something she could carry herself.

She followed Tamaki faithfully to her new room, away from where the incident had occurred. He settled for a room closer to his and easily accessed in a multiple of ways.

Haruhi felt her eyes going flat again. She closed them following the sound of Tamaki's shoes tapping steadily against the carpeted floors. She could hear Kyouya's voice forever coaxing her back to his side in the darkness. She ached to stretch out her hand to him, embrace his warmth and let the pain fade away. Her heart ached so much, she hated that bastard. But god she loved him so much. She felt a fool for trying to kill herself, but even more a fool for failing to go all the way through it. She'd only seen Kyouya once since she woke up and she'd shouted at him to get away. The shock and horror on his face was clear and crisp in her memory.

She'd opened her eyes to a beautiful angel hovering beside her a smile lit up his face but she'd exploded and replaced that angelic smile with shock as she flung out her arm smacking him across the face. The sound of his glasses skittering to a halt was like nails on a chalk board in her mind. She wanted to see him, hug him, kiss him, then smack him and make him unable to bear children in the future. Its like all her anger had finally exploded to the surface and was now battling with the love she felt towards the bastard that had broken her heart.

She blinked, and then laughed. See she even proved it. "The bastard who broke her heart?" love and hate fighting clearly right there. But her eyes decided to wander open and peer at Tamaki's back. She felt her face flush a little but lowered her eyes from him again. Tamaki had saved her life when she was ready to give it all up. He'd protected her in the dark, stayed with her through the nights where she cried and cried. He'd been there for her all the times when Kyouya should have been.

"Thank you Tamaki , for everything you've done for me." Haruhi said once her bags were settled and she was sitting comfortably on her new, huge, bed. Tamaki smiled and tossed his hair dramtically.

"Anything for my darling dau-" He was cut off suddenly when Haruhi attached herself to his chest in a tight hug. Tamaki looked down at her surprised but then surrounded her in his arms and laid his face against her soft, short hair.

"Thank you."


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 20**

**Dressed to Kill**

Kyouya paced back and forth in his hotel room. On the small wood desk besides his bed his cell phone light finally dimmed out as it went into hibernation. He finally paced himself towards the window and looked out on to the busy city. Car lights streamed by making bright blurs of red and white light. Tall sky scrapers and small business lights were like stars lay against the ground while the sky was illuminated with the light pollution.

"Damn it." He pounded his fist against the window surprised he didn't break it and let his hand streak down till it fell to the window sill, it was cold and smooth against his heated palms. Tamaki had just called refusing yet again to let Kyouya come over and see Haruhi.

Kyouya had been respectful of the space she probably would have wanted but it had been nearly two weeks and Tamaki continued to relay the message that she didn't want to see him. Kyouya could hardly stand it any longer. After all he'd said to Tamaki, after all he'd convinced himself of…..he just had to see Haruhi. He had to do _something,_ he felt like he wasting time away sitting in his hotel feeling sorry for himself, and for Haruhi. For ever thing he'd done to them both and the entire host club. The club hadn't met in weeks, the twins and Mori and Hunny were never around, except to see Haruhi. None of them seemed to know the history of what had happened; only that Haruhi had taken some medication on accident when trying to rid herself of a headache. Kyouya chuckled; he couldn't have covered it up better himself.

The twins had come to see him once when they found out he was back, and that meeting could have gone better. They screamed at him for leaving without warning, then screamed some more about how he never went to visit Haruhi. It took all his energy to hold back his anger and just shove them out the door within the first five minutes of them being here.

Collapsing on to his bed he stared at the ceiling. He lifted his left hand up and traced the scar with his eyes. The scar he'd gotten from the broken glasses and plates that he'd smashed in the backroom on the night he left. He could still hear Haruhi's low moan when she discovered him. The look in her eyes, the reflection of him in her tears.

God he hated himself so much for all that he'd done. He threw his face into the sheets and balled a pillow in his fist. He would go see Haruhi, and he'd go now.

::

Haruhi laughed lightly, not warm, but lightly as Tamaki pranced around her room showing him a whole new wardrobe he'd picked out for her to wear during her stay. It mostly consisted of big frilly dresses that she'd never wear in a million years, but a few of the selections did appeal to her. A few spring looking dresses that reminded her of the night at the beach house they'd spent. The night Kyouya had tried to back Tamaki up on punishment about her being just a girl, too weak to do more then call for help.

"I like this one most." She stood and directed Tamaki's attention to a pair of black caprice and a black top that showed some of her stomach and most of her shoulders it had to inner straps that were thin and gave the illusion it was a bra strap. Tamaki stared a little surprised at the selection but smiled like the sun and ran to it.

"Then you shall wear this tonight when we go out." Haruhi shrank back from the outfit immediately.

"But Tamaki I don't want…." The tears crept dramatically, as always, into the tall boys eyes and Haruhi sighed. She'd promised him she'd go to the Twins favorite night club with him tonight. He promised it wouldn't be as huge a party as she was thinking.

"Ok, fine, fine I'll go." She sighed and started to finger the soft fabric of the top. It sparkled in the light of her room a little and she smiled. It was a lovely set and she felt like she could be herself, and….even sexy in it. Something she'd adopted from dating Kyouya for all those months. She wanted to be cute but sexy as well. She wanted to please him….Kyouya. Her heart sank and she pulled away from the outfit going back to the edge of the bed where she sank depressed.

"Haruhi? My dear?" Tamaki joined her slinging a comforting arm around her shoulders. Haruhi sighed heavily but turned and smiled at him.

"I'm fine, maybe this "party" will be something good for me. Go out and have a little fun with my best friends." She watched his eyes sparkle and shine in excitement at her words.

"That's the attitude my dear. Here I'll leave you to change and then send someone in to do your hair and makeup." Tamaki danced off in pure bliss ignoring the low groan from Haruhi.

::

"Someone's here to see the young lady, sir." Tamaki looked down at the maid who was half his size. She had big bifocals that covered most of her face and two pig tails braided down to her shoulders.

"Thank you, send him in please." Tamaki turned and walked to the other side of the room, knowing that it was Kyouya who'd come. _Finally_, he thought with a touch of bitterness. Haruhi hadn't known of Kyouya's request to see her, Tamaki didn't have the heart to tell her about them. He was so happy at all the progress she'd been making it would be like setting her back to square one to let Kyouya back into her life right now. He just couldn't bear the thought of her getting hurt again. He wouldn't let Kyouya do it again.

"Where is she Tamaki? I came to see her, not you." Kyouya's voice was ice cold and full of reproach. Tamaki just sighed shaking his head at the other boy; he definitely wasn't ready to be introduced into Haruhi's life again.

"Why did you come here Kyouya, you know she doesn't want to see you." Tamaki turned folding his arms over his chest like he was speaking to a small, naughty, child. Kyouya looked like a mess at best. His hair was uncombed, his glasses looked dirty and his clothes were wrinkled.

"No, I think you're trying to keep her away from me." Kyouya's eyes changed, sagged under sadness but that wasn't enough to deture Tamaki.

"And I have every right to. Did you even consider the consequences of seeing her again?" Tamaki all but yelled. "What do you plan on doing? Winning her back, but then what? Going back to American to run your business? You can't do that to her, not again Kyouya." Kyouya's shoulders sagged guiltily. He was still confused, but determined.

"I have to try Tamaki, I have to try and fix things between us. I….I don't know what I'll do till I can fix this." Kyouya looked so broken and Tamaki barely had the patience to deal with him.

"And that indecision is exactly why I want you to stay away from her." Tamaki growled shoving his finger through the air in Kyouya's direction. Kyouya sensed right away the possessiveness of Tamaki's voice and his heart grew colder. Tamaki wouldn't dare try and take Haruhi from him?

"What exactly do _you_ plan to do with her then Tamaki? Sweep her off her feet and drive her away from me?" Kyouya whispered. His whisper was more powerful than any shout he could muster. Tamaki's eyes narrowed.

"You drove her away yourself." He spat. "I think it's past time you left here, Kyouya. Haruhi and I have places to go tonight."

Kyouya felt the urge to punch the teen in the face, but that would on exasperate things here. He needed to retreat and rethink his strategy. That's what he was good at wasn't? Making things turn out in favor of him? This was nothing more but another game…..

But that stakes were so much higher than any other.


	22. Chapter 22

Hey I just wanted to let everyone know that they will be a chapter update with in a few moments proably. It's a really different chapter then anything I've ever written before and I have to say it was one of my favorites to write. Haruhi gets a little out of control Tamaki is no help in the situation and I'm going to leave it with a cliffy with hopefully a good update. I just wanted to let you know, its crazy, its fun, and I love it so please no harshness in reviews, if you don't like it please don't mention it to me I really really did enjoy writing this chapter. Thanks hope you all enjoy it no matter what

cherry


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: This chapter really was so much fun to write even though it's a little older then what they probably are and a lot out of character for what they would do. But hey I wanted to add in my own kind thoughts and ideas to what could happen. I liked the idea of Haruhi losing control….and oh you'll see ; )**

* * *

**Chapter 21**

**One drink too many**

Haruhi looked into the mirror and felt a blush creep across her face. The beautiful girl in the mirror surely wasn't her. Was it?

They had added a hair piece to her short hair giving her long flowing hair that came just below her shoulder blades with a little curl at the ends. The bangs were swept to the side in a cute flipped kind of way. Her eyes had been made up with a Smokey look and her skin looked to be glowing. The woman who had done her makeup said that if she'd worn a dress tonight she would have killed at the red carpet.

"Haruhi, my dear are you…." Tamaki's jaw fell to the floor the instant Haruhi stood up and looked at him. Her fingers fidgeted together at her middle where a small patch of skin showed. She looked just gorgeous in her hair and makeup, and that outfit. God she looked beautiful and sexy all in one!

"Tamaki I think you're drooling." Haruhi laughed avoiding his eyes as he drank in the sight of her.

"This is for you my dear." Haruhi cringed a little but accepted the flower he handed to her in a gracious bow.

"Thank you." She smelled it and felt her heart pinch. Kyouya used to give her beautiful flowers that always seemed just like they'd been picked. This one smelled of the cooling fridge of a flower store. But she smiled all the same and laid it across the table where her makeup had been applied.

"Shall we be off pretty lady?" Tamaki held out his arm for Haruhi. She hesitated a moment recognizing an old look in his eyes, but finally took it and let him escort her out and into the limo.

::

Tamaki was gone from sight and Haruhi sat back in the booth her sigh drowned out into the loud music playing across the room. Everyone had glomped on to her the second she came in the club and it had taken Tamaki's possessive arm to peel away many of them. Haruhi was sure the twins had laced some of the teen's drinks with some alcohol because he was acting so much more stupid than normal. Right now he was laughing loudly to a group in the far corner; the twins were snickering nearby, much a conformation to her thoughts. She shook her head and reached for her glass uncaring of her early suspicious she downed it in an instant. She really didn't care if they had pulled the same prank on her, she needed to loosen up a little anyway.

"Looks like you could use a refill." Haruhi thanked the waiter and started sipping on the fruity beverage. She felt so out of place here and wanted to leave, but though better of it. Tamaki would go into a drunken panic if she disappeared on him. She silently remaindered herself never to go out with the twins to night clubs like this. They would surely lose sight of their behavior and run crazy all night long.

Haruhi was scanning the crowd smiling when she recognized a few faces. The twins were going nuts in the middle of the dance floor; Mori and Hunny were nowhere to be seen hopefully Mori took Hunny home.

Haruhi looked at the table feeling a little weird after about thirty minutes and was surprised to see she'd drank down six glasses of that fruity drink. She giggled and put down another empty glass. Seven.

"I want another one. Waiter!" She called out loudly over the music feeling herself tip back against the booth. A laugh erupted from her throat and she stared at the colors swirling against the ceiling of the club. She wanted to dance. Have some fun.

"Tamaki!" She screeched loud enough, surprisingly, for the blonde to, to turn. He sauntered over to her much less tipsy then she thought before, but at the moment she felt much more then tipsy, she felt on the verge of drunk. Or at least what she perceived to be drunk.

"I want to dance." Her face looked pouty and Tamaki cocked his head to the side, but extended his hand instead of picking the expression apart too much. He was happy she finally wanted to have some fun.

"Then we shall dance my dear." He led her out into the dance floor and a loud face song pounded against the speakers. Tamaki stood a little uncertain of what was to happen next but Haruhi's body took control and she instantly started swaying into the music. Her hips jumped from side to side and her hands rose into the air fingers snapping once.

"Wooo!" Haruhi shouted laughing as she started putting her shoulders into the equation bending her knees and really starting to get into the song playing. Tamaki just stood there too shocked by her to move. She swung her head from side to side her hair swiping at the air and spraying it with strawberry smells from the scents the hair dresser had sprayed her with.

"Dance with me Tamaki!" Haruhi shouted over the music grabbing his hands. She placed them on her hips and swayed against them. Haruhi shouted again when he finally curled his fingers a little and participated in her swaying hips. Her laughter bubbled out and Tamaki just couldn't get over how much better she looked. She turned suddenly grabbing another fruity drink from a passing waiter and downed it almost instantly.

"Haruhi, what are in those drinks?" Tamaki asked loudly bending over towards ear so she could hear him. He instantly felt more sober and calm then he had few minutes ago, and the happiness about her mood turned into cold suspicion. Haruhi shook her hand and shrugged pushing herself back against him.

"I don't know, but I like 'em." She laughed turning again and grabbing his shoulders so she was practically straddled on his knee. She kept swaying her hips and pumping them to the music forcing Tamaki into similar motions. She started dipping and bending to the music and with a start Tamaki realized that the two of them were now grinding against one another to the music. His face turned red but for some stupid reason he didn't push her away. He liked having her so close, her so happy….

"Haruhi are you feeling alright?" Tamaki asked worriedly as she slung her arm around his neck and started dipping backwards to a suggestion in the song. Tamaki placed his hand on her back and brought her back up their faces suddenly dangerously close. Haruhi stared at him a little surprised at the look in his eyes. She defiantly wasn't _that _drunk.

"I'm going to get another drink." She pushed away from him and fled into the crowd looking for that fruity drink she was so fond of.

"What was that about!" The twins descended on Tamaki and he was unable to beat them back and go after her.

Haruhi pushed through the crowd and finally landed against the bar.

"How old are you?" The bartender asked, but Haruhi ignored him and pointed towards an empty drink that looked like hers.

"Can I have one of those please?" She asked smiling perfectly. The bartender shrugged and then made her up a large glass. Haruhi giggled, thanked him and turned trying to fight the crowd back to her booth.

Finally managing to get there she could see the twins had cornered a sober looking Tamaki in a corner and by the look on his face they weren't saying anything nice to him. She laughed for some odd reason and kept drinking her drink. She felt her legs twitching to go back out there. She wanted to dance, to forget and get some fun from someone besides Kyouya. He didn't have to be her only source of life, love and happiness. She felt her stomach turning painfully. But no, she wouldn't' do that to herself again. She was alive, thanks to Tamaki. She may not love him like she did Kyouya but she sure could enjoy his company.

Haruhi downed the rest of her drink and stumbled a little before heading back to the dance floor. It was getting more packed the later it got but Haruhi managed to squeeze in and have enough room to herself where she could spin, sway and dip all she wanted without bumping into other people. She felt the air around her grow hot and heavy. She swung her head around feeling the colored lights splash against her skin and bath her in rainbows. She dipped and came back up feeling the slickness of her skin as she perspired to the music's heavy beat. Then suddenly hands folded around her middle and she felt a strong presence press against her back. She ignored whoever the stranger was, suspecting it to be Tamaki, too drunk to care and leaned back against this man pumping her hips to music and swaying with his body.

The hands snaked down till one hand was on her thigh just above where her knee was bent the other hovering on the bare patch of skin on her stomach. Haruhi closed her eyes liking the feeling of whoever it was. It reminded her of Kyouya in ways, even smelled like him. She pushed her head back exposing her neck to the cool air and falling her head to this man's shoulder.

"You look beautiful Haruhi." Kyouya whispered kissing the shinning skin of her neck, leaving a strangled gasp in the pause of the music.


	24. Chapter 24

A/N: Warning this chapter does get a little heavy but its nothing explicit but just a fair warning there will be a lot of kissing and suggestive things, nothing to concern yourself but I'd rate this chapter a T+ for safety. But do enjoy I'm loving this story myself, I hope you are too : )

* * *

**Chapter 22**

**Drunken Happiness**

"Kyouya!" Haruhi snapped her warm chocolate eyes open to see the husky looking Kyouya staring down at her. No glasses.

_Damn he looks hot!_ Was of course the first thought Haruhi could muster up in her little better then drunken state.

"Hello, Haruhi." _**Smart comment!**_ Kyouya raged at himself instantly. He looked down at Haruhi, god she looked so different, but so beautiful. Her hair was messy but only adding to the sexiness of her makeup and outfit. Only Tamaki could have gotten her into something like this. He wondered where the teen was, why wasn't he with Haruhi? Before either one of them could muster anything to say to the other a song floated out between them.

"Would you care to dance?" He asked turning her so she no longer had her back to him. Haruhi blinked and without an answer Kyouya took one hand up into the air placed her other hand on his shoulder and his on her hip. Kyouya started to step to the side turning Haruhi in slow even circles, she followed staring up at him like a deer caught in the head lights.

"What are you doing here?" She whispered as the slow song swayed more calmly then the other music, she felt all her energy draining away from her. Haruhi pulled herself tighter to him laying her head instantly against his shoulder, he smelled so good, he smelled like old happiness. Kyouya leaned his head against hers unable to figure out how he had ever left her here, alone. She was so beautiful, so wonderful.

"I wanted to see you, will you come with me?" Haruhi didn't answer again, but didn't pull away as he led her through the crowd and towards the back door.

The night hair was like a shot of cold straight to her face and she shrank back for a moment. Kyouya pulled her along offering her his arm as warmth. She snuggled against his side stumbling more then was normal. Kyouya frowned down at her but didn't say anything till they were walking quietly down a lonely street where no other soul walked.

"Why did you come back, Kyouya." Haruhi's voice was harsh when she finally pulled from his arm. He didn't try and pull her back only sighed placing his hands into his jean pockets. Haruhi took this moment of silence to take in his slightly blurry image. He was messily dressed but it fit in for a teenager. His hair was combed at least. This was not the same boy who had abandoned her almost two months ago.

"I'm sorry Haruhi." She snorted folding her arms over her chest. She was starting to get a headache and each step seemed to falter under her.

"I really am, I don't know what else I could possibly say to you. It's pathetic but it's all I have. I realize what I did was a mistake, it never should have happened, but I'm a stupid person." Haruhi felt the tears sting her eyes.

"What exactly was your mistake, huh?" Kyouya turned to her pain filling his eyes. "Kissing me that day in the band room, or leaving me here without a word of goodbye?" She felt the icy sting of tears falling down her face but didn't have the strength in her arms to wipe them away. Kyouya reached out to do it for her but she smack his hand away roughly.

"Don't touch me. You have no right." She sobbed feeling all control of emotions run away. "You hurt me so bad! I would have understood. I would have been happy for you! You lied, you didn't tell me and you abandoned me! You left me when I needed you! You weren't there!" Her words were screamed in his face and each word drove tears from her eyes. Kyouya stood there and took it all with a calm stony face. His eyes were the only indication of what he was really thinking. They would be bleeding if they could.

"You weren't there, you weren't there." She cried over and over again dropping to her knees folding her arms around herself. Kyouya kneeled with her and wrapped his arms around her pressing his face into her shoulder.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Haruhi pushed him back grabbing a fist full of his shirt she dragged his lips down to hers. Kyouya could taste the alcohol on her lips and made a silent note to beat the hell out of Tamaki for letting her get drunk.

"Haruhi, you're drunk." Kyouya groaned pushing back from her regretfully. Tears were pooled in her beautiful eyes.

"I know, I don't care." She said sniffling as tears washed away some of the makeup Tamaki's people had placed so perfectly.

"Let me take you home." He grabbed her in his arms and cradled her to his chest as he took the familiar path back to her apartment.

::

"Is your father home?" Kyouya asked pushing open the door after Haruhi unlocked it.

"No, Tamaki gave him tickets to a vacation spot. He's been so stressed since…." Haruhi let the slightly slurred sentence trail off as she stumbled inside. Kyouya followed cautiously only wanting to get her back in her bed and asleep. He should have taken her back to Tamaki's but that just didn't seem like the right atmosphere for them to talk. Though talking with someone who was drunk wasn't the greatest choice either, but Kyouya saw no other alternative at the moment.

"Haruhi, I know this might be a little hard but I want to talk to yo-" Kyouya was cut off as Haruhi thrust herself towards him and pressed her lips to him. Kyouya tried to push her away but only succeeded in pushing her up against a wall and her locking her hands in his hair dragging him down for more. He groaned finally giving into her drunken kisses. Haruhi moaned into the kiss giving into more passionate kisses.

"Haruhi, no, this is wrong. You're drunk, and really pissed at me sober." He chuckled a little when a grin started to form on her lips.

"Then I suggest you take advantage of my drunken happiness while you're here." She nuzzled against his shoulder and Kyouya trailed kisses down her neck. She rolled her head back till it thunked against the wall allowing Kyouya full access to her shoulders and neck area. She moaned she'd forgotten how glorious his kissed could be when he placed them just right. He liked to calculate things and he calculated kisses especially. Just the right amount of gentleness, a little lick to cool a little nip to keep her attentive.

"Oh, Kyouya." Haruhi grabbed his head and made him kiss her full on the lips again. She parted her lips flicking her tongue against his lips seeking exactly what he thrust into her mouth. She pushed against him and he pushed back. He reached down wrapping one leg around his waist and then lifted her up as she wrapped the other around him. Neither broke the kiss as they stumbled a little down the hall to her room. Haruhi didn't care where this would led them, all she knew was that she wanted Kyouya, wanted him badly and if she had to sleep with him to keep him, she saw no faults in it.

But on the other hand Kyouya was desperately trying to control himself, he couldn't break the kiss he didn't want to, and Haruhi wouldn't allow it. But he had to get her back to her room where he could force her to sleep. He could sense what Haruhi was willing to give him, but he would not take it from her. Not like this not this way. He stumbled into her room and she fell back on her bed when he released her. She lifted her arms in the air and a small whimper came from her lips. He looked down seeing tears in her eyes. Some of her make up had smeared on the sides, she looked like a mess. But Kyouya stilled loved her all the same.

"Oh Haruhi, no no, don't cry anymore." He leaned over her kissing her lips and face wiping away the tears with gentle, loving finger tips.

"Kyouya…" He put a finger to her trembling lips and shook his head refusing her unspoken proposal.

"No, Haruhi. Lie down, sleep. I'll stay right here. Just like old times. I won't leave you, my dear." Haruhi nodded her headache suddenly coming back with a vengeance. She rolled over stripping off her top leaving only a small short tank top that fell a good three inches above her belly button. Next came the hair piece she ripped it off and shook the small mess of hair on her head. Before Kyouya could stop her she'd kicked off her pants and was lying on her back on the bed arms flailed out to each side legs hanging off the side. Kyouya stared at her realizing that she'd passed out, he chuckled.

"Oh what a strange creature you are." He rearranged her so she was snug under the blankets and curled into the pillows. Like he promised he stayed there with her all night. The only thing he removed was his socks and shirt. He didn't want to give Haruhi any wrong impressions when she woke, probably hung over and cranky.

He laid down beside her and she wiggled under his arm and against his chest. He kissed the top of her head and absently stroked the skin on her back, he'd forgotten that her skin was silk. This would be a long night, and an even tougher morning.

He wondered with a smirk of victory where Tamaki was at this moment.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 23**

**You're to blame**

Tamaki was in a blind panic. Where was Haruhi! He'd enlisted the help of the twins and they were prowling through the night club searching each face for her. But she was nowhere in sight. Tamaki thought he would just keel over right there and then. He'd lost Haruhi!

"Have you seen this beautiful innocent little girl?" Tamaki demanded running up the bartender a picture of Haruhi already flipped out and shoved at the guy. The man took it with an irritated look.

"Oh, yea she left a while back with a tall gentlemen." The bartender handed back the picture to a very pale Tamaki.

"What did this man look like?" Tamaki questioned hoarsely.

"He was young looking, tall, dark hair and dark eyes. Looked kinda messy to be leaving with such a pretty girl." Tamaki felt his heart constrict. Who was this stranger Haruhi had left with?

Tamaki ran from the club and started to shout Haruhi's name out into the cool night air. But it was useless she was nowhere in sight and definitely not able to hear his voice no matter how loud he panicked.

She was gone…

::

_How did this happen?_ Kyouya wondered as he hunkered behind the couch the fabric was old and smelled of memories. Memories he'd once shared here with Haruhi, ones where she laughed and so did he. He always thought the sound was strange, his laughter, but she loved it. That however was nowhere close to what he was hearing at the moment. He was hearing Haruhi's shrill screams and the sound of another broken item shatter above his head.

"Haruhi calm down, please. You are being ridiculous!" Kyouya shouted as he peeked his head above the couch. She let out a screech of what he assumed was rage and threw a small vase that had been nearby. He ducked and he went flying past his head to smash against the far wall. She was still "_half naked"_ as she had put it when she woke up, and throwing anything she got her hands on. He had a small gash by his eye where a book had met its target. Red stains dotted against his white shirt where the blood had dripped.

"What the hell are you doing here!" She screamed yet again. Kyouya quickly dashed from behind the couch and latched his arms around Haruhi's tiny body when she bent to pick up something else to chuck at him.

"Haruhi, please." Kyouya begged squeezing her tighter as she kicked and flailed out. He stumbled backwards falling on to the couch that had been his shield only seconds again. She grunted as his arms tightened. He tried to wrap his legs around hers as they kicked out brutally looking for something to hurt him.

"Let me go!" She screamed pushing against his arms with all her might. She sent her elbow flying backwards into his side, he winced and she took his lapse in strength to push forward which ended with her face planting it on the floor with Kyouya on top. He quickly rolled her over straddled her hips and pushed her wrists down roughly. His hair waved in front of his face and her splashed out on the floor.

"Haruhi!" He shouted. She bucked her hips and kicked crying out. Kyouya struggled to keep her down but she finally calmed down but tears were gushing from her eyes and she closed them unwilling to see the anguish in his eyes as he watched.

"Haruhi, please can I explain?" He asked carefully easing his weight off her but not getting off completely. Haruhi didn't answer only laid there in silence broken things scattered around them. When she didn't speak he took that as permission to speak.

"You were at a night club, do you remember?" Haruhi's eyes opened, but she didn't watch him, her tears continued to pump out. "You were drinking and dancing, I took you home. That's all. That's all that happened." He smoothed her hair back from her scalp. "I promise you my dear. Nothing happened." He leaned forward and kissed her head. She sobbed suddenly and began to tremble beneath him.

"Haruhi, oh Haruhi." He gathered her from the floor and squeezed her form against his chest. Her heart pulsed out against his chest as she wound her arms wound hesitantly around his neck.

"Kyouya!" Haruhi gasped suddenly.

"Kyouya! I knew you were to blame for this." Tamaki's voice broke out suddenly and Kyouya felt the back of his shirt being grabbed. Before he could do anything he was being dragged away from Haruhi. She sat in a pile of tears screaming at Tamaki to let him go.


	26. Chapter 26

A/N: Hope you like this chapter my story is FINALLY winding down to a conclusion : D

* * *

**Chapter 24**

**Speeding**

Tamaki towered over Kyouya's form with pure hideous rage burning in his once gentle soft blue eyes. They had been tarnished the anguish, pain and hatred he'd been forced to deal with through the last two months. Pain and anguish which was Kyouya's fault, the hatred only grew through all of the mess. Kyouya leapt to his feet quickly after being dragged from Haruhi's apartment like he was a unwanted dog. He wiped at the blood from the cut Haruhi had caused. It smeared across his temple leaving him looking like a Indian warrior about to go into battle.

"What are you doing here, with her!" Tamaki shouted making a grab at Kyouya's wrinkled shirt. Kyouya back away stepping quickly and continued to do so as Tamaki chased after him. Then suddenly he fell off the side walk and was now retreating into the middle of the road.

"I wasn't doing anything!" Kyouya defended feeling his anger grow rapidly in his chest. Tamaki was really pissing him off. Trying to keep him from Haruhi in every way possible, he'd had enough of it. He told himself he'd do whatever it takes to get her back, and if that meant kicking his best friend in the ass, then that's exactly what he would do.

"What are you doing, you idiot!" Kyouya demanded dodging another poorly aimed punch. Tamaki recovered and the rage on his face was so unlike him. Kyouya worried that maybe the panicked teen had indulged in a few extra drinks on his search for Haruhi. Or maybe Tamaki was really just that pissed off.

"Trying to protect her!" Tamaki's hand flew out to Haruhi standing on the sidewalk tears streaming down her eyes. Her breath was coming in pants like she'd run a marathon. She had one of Kyouya's old jackets thrown around her body but he could still see her trembling. Kyouya's eyes softened as he watched her stand there desperately trying to think of something to say to stop this.

"You bastard. Stop gawking at her like she's still yours." Kyouya felt Tamaki's fist slam into his face and he stumbled back till finally falling to the street. The impact hurt and only fueled Kyouya's rage. Kyouya spat out some blood and rubbed his jaw as he stood slowly to his feet. His eyes were twice as menacing as they would have been had he had his glasses.

"Tamaki stop!" Haruhi cried at him finally but the blonde teen had no ears for her pleas now. His eyes were set on Kyouya and he looked ready to murder.

"Tamaki you've kept her away from me this entire time. I came back to fix my mistakes. I've tried to see her, make up for something, but you wouldn't let me within a hundred feet of her!" Kyouya shouted staring at Haruhi but directing his voice at Tamaki. Haruhi's breath hitched in her throat and tears pumped down her cheeks. She looked at Tamaki accusingly.

"You came back because you thought she was going to die! You didn't even care when you got here, you acted like she was a dying rat or something. How could I let you near her after that show!" Tamaki was just raging now and Kyouya was astounded that he would say such a stupid lie.

"What did you want me to do? Huh? Get on my knees and sob like an idiot, pound at walls and scream at the skies. You know me….you know me better than that." Kyouya's words of anger died towards the end till he was all but whispering.

"You should have _loved_ her! You should have _stayed_ with her instead of running away like a scared puppy!" Haruhi let out a wail and ran to put herself between the two boys as Kyouya took threatening steps towards Tamaki.

"Stop this!" She cried shoving out her arms. Tamaki grabbed her wrist and yanked her behind him like she was nothing more than a small child in the way of mommy and daddy's argument.

"You ran away while I stayed and watched her cry. I heard her scream every night, I held her when she shook. I loved her better than you ever did. I was there when she needed someone, where were you?" Tamaki spat the cruelty at Kyouya and his aim was straight into his heart. Kyouya's anger deflated at the truth in those words. He had run away, and he hadn't been there for her.

"Kyouya look out!" Kyouya looked up startled by Haruhi's scream to see Tamaki snatch up Haruhi as she tried to bolt for the teen towards Kyouya. Tamaki's face was contorted in shock and terror.

"Kyouya!" He turned as Haruhi screamed again filling the air with an echoing sound of terror so great it would never be matched. He felt the impact of the speeding vehicle before he even focused his eyes on it. His side folded inward and he was spun up onto the window shield, he felt the impact shatter against his back as he rolled off the roof and onto the other side where the road greeted him harshly with embrace that bounced his head.

"Kyouya! Kyouya!" His head was fogy and his eyes blurred and all he could hear was screaming. Pain and screaming.


	27. Chapter 27

A/N:

**Chapter 25**

**To live or die**

Kyouya stood ridged and alone in a circle of light that had enough space for him to take a few steps either way. Shadows covered the area outside the circle. He felt small and weak here, his body was cold and his heart ached. He had no strengthen for anything but fear, regrets and hopeless ness.

"Haruhi! Haruhi where are you?" He called out desperately for her. His voice surprised him, adopting the small child like qualities. He _needed_ to see her, to hold her in his arms and kiss her face. He was craving her like an addict he _needed_ to feel her.

"I'm right her Kyouya." A second ring of light appeared behind Kyouya. He spun to see her standing there in her school uniform. Her smile was large and warm, something like the smile she wore when they had first expressed their feelings for each other.

"I'm right here Kyouya." Another light appeared and in this one Kyouya saw with horror a Haruhi with tear streaked make up lines across her face. Her body was pale and thin, a worn jacket thrown across her like a tarp. The difference between them was a harsh reminder of what he'd done to this beautiful girl.

"Oh, Haruhi." He stretched out his hand wanting to sooth back the lines of pain on her face but the coldness of the dark seared against his flesh. He whipped back his hand hissing at the pain it inflicted. He rubbed the sore flesh trying to worm the warmth back into his fingers.

"What did you want Kyouya?" The happy Haruhi asked titling her head to the side and watching him through those sweet innocent eyes. He could see the overwhelming love swimming in her irises. He wanted so badly to stretch out his hand and cup her face. But the pain….he was afraid of the pain he'd feel.

"What has happened?" He asked as the two Haruhi's started to walk towards each other till their light was one.

"Why am I here?" Kyouya's hand was throbbing like it had been crushed under the enormous pressure of the abyss around him.

"You are dying Kyouya. Just like I was dying." The tear streaked Haruhi mumbled staring at her feet as if ashamed by her words. Kyouya started by her words took a few steps away from them and felt the searing pain of the cold attack his foot and back.

"You can save yourself; no one can do it for you." He lurched forward crying out in pain as he fell to his knees and hands in the circle of light.

"Tamaki saved me, when you stood on the side lines." Kyouya's body began to shake and tremble as he flinched back from her words.

"So I will stand back and watch you, it's your choice whether you live or not." Kyouya fell backwards suddenly falling into the blackness like the world had titled upward and thrown him off and his scream echoed all around him as pain seared across his skin.

::

"Tamaki!" Haruhi cried in frustration when he restrained her yet again. She stared into the ambulance with tears streaking down her face. Kyouya was laid out on a stretcher with two paramedics over his body sending volts of electricity into his heart trying to restart him. The sound of his flat line was horrifying to her.

"Haruhi no you can't help him, please stay!" Tamaki held her back his face contorted in pain. He couldn't believe what had just happened. His anger and jealousy of Kyouya had landed his best friend in the back of an ambulance. He'd hurt Haruhi more now than Kyouya had her.

"Tamaki let me go! I have to be with him!" She sobbed falling to her knees and trying to crawl from the teens grasp. What if he died? How would she live with herself knowing he was dead and rotting six feet down?

"Haruhi, please." Tamaki held her down squeezing her till she couldn't cry out anymore only gasp for air as the tears drowned her.

"Ok, we need to get him to the hospital now!" The sound of a heart beat was the greatest sound Haruhi had ever heard. She however felt another powerful sob surging up when the doors were closed and the ambulance sped away the lights flashing in the early morning light.

"Let me go Tamaki!"

"No!"

"Why! Why did you do this to him!" She spun around in his grasp suddenly and pounded her fists into his chest. Tamaki fell back and she continued to pound on his chest screaming at him till her strength left her and she fell to his chest sobbing uncontrollably.

"He's going to die….he's going to die…..he can't die Tamaki. He can't die…" Tamaki smoothed her hair staring up into the cloudy sky tears forming in his eyes.

He'd killed his best friend.


	28. Chapter 28

A/N: Sorry for delays, my senior year of high school is trying to strangle me early. Please enjoy :D

* * *

**Chapter 26**

**Please**

Kyouya sobbed into the frigid ground. His body curled into the fetal position; the pain was great as he laid in the dark. Why was he here? Why couldn't he just die and get over this.

"Because that would be to simple, my friend." A ring of light illuminated Tamaki's form leaning to one side as if bored by Kyouya's private thoughts.

"Tamaki…." Kyouya croaked, unsure if he was angry or happy to see his best friend illuminated like an angel before him. Tamaki rolled his eyes and handed him an exasperated look lined with pity.

"Look at how pitfall you are Kyouya. What happened to the great Ootori that I called my friend?" The blonde sneered folding his arms across his chest.

"Tamaki, you bastard. Help me." Kyouya reached out his hand but Tamaki kicked it away like he was a dirty beggar.

"Help yourself, you weren't there for Haruhi." The sentence flew at him like a knife and cut deep into his heart.

"I had to think of something else!" Kyouya raged back rolling on to his back feeling each movement like a stabbing pain. He couldn't have focused solely on Haruhi, on his emotions and feelings for her. It would have torn him apart….

"Had to think of what? What did you have to think about beside what your heart felt?" Tamaki followed and stood on either side of Kyouya's torso. The tall teen bent down tapping on Kyouya's heart viciously.

"Was this organ so useless to you? Maybe I should take it from you!" Tamaki screamed slamming his fist down into Kyouya's chest. He screamed out in utter agony.

"Haruhi!" He screamed out desperate to see her once more before he finally died. Just once more, now that he felt for sure he would die he needed to see her; feel her breath on his skin, the smile on his lips. He needed her so much. Tamaki's hand felt like he was sending thousands of volts of electricity through his body, god it hurt so badly.

"Haruhi please!" Kyouya screamed trying to struggle with Tamaki as he continued to torture Kyouya with this unbearable pain. A small light began to appear behind Tamaki. Kyouya shifted his tearful eyes to the light and watched it grow. Slowly a figure walked from the dark and into the light.

"Haruhi…" Kyouya breathed in a light whisper as her face appeared in the light. She was so beautiful, her short hair sheltered her eyes and he could only see small brown flecks peering back at him. Her hand was in a closed fist against her lips and slowly he saw a small grin appear behind her hand.

He closed his eyes content to die now.


	29. Chapter 29

A/N: MewTama-ChanKick happy birthday! Hope it's a good birthday for you. Here's my present to you ;)

**Chapter 27**

Haruhi leaned over her knees feeling the need to vomit again, but her stomach was bone dry and her eyes were raw with exhaustion. They'd been over worked as Kyouya had flat lined once they were at the hospital. They managed to restart his heart but her heart was erratic after that scare. That must have been what Kyouya felt like when she was in her coma. If he'd even been there to care at all. She had seen him when she woke, but he didn't look like he was scared to death like she was right now. He instead just wore an Ootori look, calm collected….cold and emotionless.

Standing she looked into the room where Kyouya laid still and motionless. He was heavily sedated; the doctors feared too much attention or stress would cause him to flat line for good this time. In other words, they didn't want Haruhi to stress his heart out if he saw her.

"How are you doing?" A hand fell like a feather on her shoulder but she sagged under it anyways.

"How do you expect I'm doing?" She turned harsh eyes on Tamaki and he shrank away knowingly.

"You know, I've been in this hospital before. Having to watch the two people I care most for suffer like this. I don't want to do it anymore Haruhi." Tamaki's eyes were rusting away under all the pain and guilt. Haruhi knew how he felt about all this mess, but she couldn't find it in her heart to let it go. She needed to be angry, or else waste away under the grief again.

"You kept him away from me….didn't you, Tamaki." Her voice was accusing, he flinched away but sighed and turned to take his punishment.

"I didn't think it was-" Her hand stung his face and he stood silent as his right cheek turned pink.

"You bastard! You had no right to keep him from me!" She screeched tears mingling with her callous words. "I loved him Tamaki! It was my choice." She sobbed covering her face from him.

"You think I don't know that! I was there for you, while he sat in some cushioned business chair thousands of miles away from you. I held you screaming and crying whether you wanted it or not when he wouldn't even take my call to tell him about you. He was never there for you!" Tamaki was shouting now. Haruhi Backed away till her head thunked against the window that peered into Kyouya's room. Tamaki's arms shot out to make a cage on either side of her head. His face came closer.

"I wasn't going to let him come back into your life, and screw you over again. I cared too much for that Haruhi." One hand lightly stroked the side of her face and wiped the tears away from her eyes.

"It was still my choice." She stuttered through her tears. Tamaki sighed and gathered the girl close to him. She sobbed into his jacket as he stroked her hair lovingly. He kissed the top of her head and when his eyes opened he was staring into the eyes of Kyouya Ootori.

::

"He's awake!" Tamaki all but screamed down the hall. Haruhi turned from Tamaki's grasp and saw Kyouya moving slowly on the bed, trying to sit up. His eyes caught her and he stilled. The tears on her face seemed guilty and Kyouya looked at them as her arms still clung to Tamaki's body. A tightening in his chest made his face contort in pain.

"Kyouya!" Haruhi screamed as the teen flung himself backwards. His heart monitor was going crazy.

"Oh God! Tamaki help him!" Haruhi screamed falling onto the floor as nurses and doctors rushed into the room.

"Get more sedatives!" Someone yelled through all the panic.

::

"You see that." Kyouya's eyes burned with tears as he flung his arms out trying to strike the image of Tamaki looming over him.

"See how she holds to him, how he soothes her hair. She doesn't need you anymore." Tamaki sneered at Kyouya. Tamaki kneeled towards kyouya's hear and hissed the words.

"She doesn't need you."

::

Haruhi leaned over Kyouya's bed at his feet. His body was arched and he was failing around as the nurses and doctors tried to restrain him as his vitals became more and more erratic. She could feel it this time, this would be the end. Kyouya was giving up on life.

Memories of all they had had together flashed through her mind. That first kiss, those hesitate touches and embraces late at night. The beating of his heart, the breath against her neck. Her heart grew more and more erratic as she watched Kyouya fling around.

"Kyouya Ootori don't you dare die!" She screamed suddenly startling everyone in the room into silence and into stillness.

"Doctor!" A nurse shouted suddenly pointing to the heart monitor.

"He's stabilizing."


	30. Chapter 30

A/N:

**Chapter 28**

**Awake**

Kyouya opened his tired eyes slowly feeling the after affects of being heavily sedated for so long. The hospital room lights were dimmed but still blinded him. A low groan came from his throat and interrupted the quiet around him. His whole body ached like he'd been hit with a truck. Oh wait, he had.

"Kyouya?" A petite face appeared suddenly hovering over his. Kyouya peered into the dark chocolate eyes; he saw red, puffy and that they were full of grief and strain. Hauhi's features slowly became clearer as she drew in a little closer to his face, her eyes grew more anxious and he saw the reflection of tears in her eyes.

"Are you alright?" Her voice squeaked as she tried to control the emotions in her throat. Kyouya stared up at her amazed to see her so fearful of his life. Why couldn't he have shown her that emotion when their places had been reversed? He hated himself so much, but she cared all the same.

"Kyouya!" She cried shaking him she finally let her tears spill over on to him. Kyouya abruptly came to his sense and lifted his arms up around her drawing her against his chest in a crushing hug. She sobbed into his hospital gown and shook as he cradled her closely. Sharp pains shot up his arm but he ignored it, he only wanted this moment to last forever. Haruhi was so close, it was almost like old times. Almost…..

"Haruhi…" His voice cracked and she pulled away as the tears fell from his own eyes.

"Oh, Kyouya you stupid bastard." She cried whipping her gaze from him angrily. Kyouya stroked the back of her head and stared into her beautiful face as she continued to radiate anger. He could see the scares he'd caused her lining around the eyes and lips. They were there plain to see to whoever had the heart to look. He'd caused her so much grief, so much pain. And all because of secrets. But he would smooth the scars away till they were invisible.

Before he realized what he was doing, he'd leaned forward and stolen a kiss. Haruhi cried against his lips as she felt the familiar texture press hesitantly to her but gave in feeling the anxiety and fear they both had shared so much of. His lips were cool, just warming from the grasp death had had on his soul. He tasted of salt, loss and memories.

"I love you Haruhi." He whispered pressing his forehead to hers when they parted. Haruhi closed her eyes and laughed bitterly.

"I love you too Kyouya." She lifted her eyes and watched his grow in surprise, but they softened again into quiet love.

"I'm so sorry for leaving you all alone." He stroked her face with a bandaged hand that suddenly felt too heavy. He struggled to keep his eyes open as her features became more and more blurred. She just smiled and shook her head with a half sob half laugh. He heard her mumble one last time before falling back into the abyss of sleep

"You stupid, stupid bastard."

::

Haruhi watched Kyouya slowly fall back to sleep and when she felt he'd fallen deeply to sleep she carefully picked herself up from the bed and walked out into the hall way. Every fiber of her body was screaming that she not leave him, but her heart carried her legs away from him. The entire host club was perched on the edge of the doorway eager for news of their fallen comrade. Haruhi looked at each face and saw the past where things had been so happy. When their lives had been nothing but friendship, no romance, no secrets. Life had been so much simpler.

"He woke up for a moment, but he's sleeping again. I think he'll be alright." Haruhi smiled lightly to the others as they all exhaled quietly.

"What is with people and near death situations? First Haruhi, now Kyouya who's next Tamaki?" Hikaru grumbled leaning against his twin for support. Kaoru just leaned on him as well looking quiet dejected.

"Kyouya was in an accident, there will be no more near death situations. I promise." Tamaki said from the back of the group everyone turned to look at him. His hands were shoved in his pockets and he looked quiet messy but his eyes were fierce and protective. Haruhi smiled at him, her silence told him "thank you."

The host club disbanded towards different destinations. Hunny and Mori paired off towards the cafeteria thinking to bring Kyouya something sweet. The twins walked away into a dark hallway snickering and giggling to themselves, that left only Tamaki and Haruhi. He stood in front of her his posture unmoving as he watched her.

"What are you going to do now, Haruhi?" He asked pointedly. His gaze shifted to the room behind him for moment as his heart constricted.

"I….I don't know Tamaki." She whispered hugging her arms to herself. Tears swam in her troubled eyes but they never spilled over.

"He's trying." Tamaki whispered, his voice straining to find the right emotions for her to understand. She just laughed and shook her head a bitterness returning to her face.

"He should have _tried_ before. Trying not might not be enough for me. I doubt he'll be able to find all the pieces to make it right anymore." She turned her back on Tamaki and stared into the window where Kyouya slept peacefully.

"He'll never stop trying." Tamaki whispered, but to quietly for Haruhi to hear him. He instead turned and walked away. He couldn't help Haruhi win this battle, it was all up to her now.


	31. Chapter 31

A/N:I love all my faithful readers so much :) You've stuck with me through all this chaos and mess. Thanks for all the patience and love you've all given me :D I Hope you enjoy this LAST chapter in the story. Thank you again!

**Chapter 29**

**Secrets**

Kyouya looked out the window of the limo with quiet eyes that felt overly tired and exhausted though he'd spent much time sleeping at the hospital. It had been a week and the doctors felt it was safe enough for him to return home. He'd broken his wrist, and had a slight concussion thanks to the accident. The overall shock of everything had been what had stressed his heart out to the near breaking point. But after a few prescriptions and a stress free weekend they announced him free to leave.

Tamaki had insisted on taking Kyouya home himself and Kyouya hadn't the strength to argue with the boy over such a silly request. So Kyouya was piled into Tamaki's limo like a fragile piece of glass.

"Almost home." Tamaki announced suddenly causing the black haired teen to jump.

"Yes." Kyouya pushed his glasses up his face careful of the cast on his left hand. It was an annoying thing but he had to live with it.

"You excited?" Tamaki asked with an air of secrets in his voice. Kyouya slid his eyes towards the blonde teen but Tamaki turned away quickly avoiding any gaze.

"I suppose I feel some content for returning home." Kyouya admitted turning his gaze back to the window. He was actually not excited to go home at all, he was only thinking of Haruhi. He'd seen her maybe a handful of times since he woke up that initial time in the hospital and not once had she been alone with him. He found it almost disturbing the kind of vibe he was getting from her. It was as if the past year had been wiped clean in her mind, like it never happened. When he looked into her eyes he saw the girl who had first come to them. Someone who didn't know all his secrets, didn't know what made him laugh didn't know what made him cry. She wasn't acting like the Haruhi who he had cradled late through the nights. Kyouya didn't want that. He wanted her to forget the bad, yes he admitted that, but not the good. Not the months they had spent together as a couple. The love that had bloomed unknowingly between their kisses and their laughs. The soft touches and secret meetings late at night. There had always been a kind of excitement for them both for sharing such a deep secret between them. But now it was as if nothing had ever occurred. Kyouya was quiet anxious to get back home, talk to Haruhi and find out what exactly was to become of them.

"Here we are. Why don't you go straight up to your room and take a nap, I'll bring your bags in." Tamaki exited the limo and immediately was met by a servant that started unpacking the trunk that had Kyouya's personal hospital items inside.

"Alright." Kyouya didn't argue and quickly went to his room; he intended to call Haruhi as soon as possible.

Kyouya entered the cold stale air of his bedroom and quickly closed the door behind. Shuffling to the desk he picked up the phone and started punching in Haruhi's number for her cell. He stood with his back to the rest of the room and listened to the phone ring. Then suddenly he heard a cell phone ring coming from behind him. Turning slowly he looked over his shoulder to see Haruhi smirking from the edge of his bed her cell in her hand ringing with his call.

"Haruhi." Kyouya said dumbfounded staring at the girl. She started to laugh as he continued to stare at her with the phone to his ear.

"Hello Kyouya." She laughed. Kyouya hung up his phone and stood there unsure of what to do now. Haruhi made him so nervous suddenly. No one, let alone a woman, had driven him to such emotional extremes. But that's what love did a person.

"Hello Haruhi." Kyouya mumbled unable to take his eyes off her face. She was lovely in the sunlight. She must have opened a curtain when she'd been waiting for him. It hit her face beautifully making her seem like a goddess.

"Are you feeling better?" She inquired titling her head to the side making her unbelievably cute in his eyes.

"Yes." God he felt so stupid. Why wasn't he spilling his heart to her, he loved her wanted her and needed her so badly. So why couldn't he just say that to her. He thought of one way to announce these feelings. In quick strides he crossed the room and leaned into Haruhi's outstretched arms and kissed her. One knee hit the edge of the bed his arms shot out to balance him on either side of Haruhi and she wrapped her arms around his neck giving into his passionate kiss as she was forced to tilt backwards slightly.

"I'm sorry." He whispered pressing his forehead to hers. Haruhi made a sniffling sound and nodded.

"You should be." The words stung but Kyouya took the punishment of them. Kyouya slid himself down and kneeled on the floor resting his head on her breasts as he listened to her heart beat frantically. She hugged his head close to her and stroked the hair on the side of his face. He closed his eyes listening to her breath and loving the sensation of her fingers trailing across his skin.

"Do you still want me Haruhi?" Kyouya whispered feeling a lump grow in his stomach. There was a long pause and Kyouya felt the speed of Haruhi's heart increase.

"Do you still love me?" Kyouya asked lifting his face to see the tears in her eyes pooling at the corners.

"Will you still have me in your life?" He cupped her face and she leaned into his palm as he sat up on his knees to be eye level with her.

"You haven't earned a place in my life let alone my heart Kyouya." Haruhi whispered letting her tears spill over into his hand. Kyouya felt his heart start to crumble at those words. So this was how it would end, she'd remove him from her life.

"But." She stared hard into his eyes. She'd witnessed the pain and heartbreak and knew it was real.

"You will earn your place back. I still want you, I still need you and I love you. I won't let you leave again Kyouya." She laughed as his face lit up brighter then the sun.

"Haruhi you wonderful woman." He suddenly grabbed her around the waist and lifted her up into the air twirling her around easily despite his hurt wrist. She laughed holding onto him as he stopped in the middle of the room and lowered her back to her feet slowly. He stared quietly down into her beauty and leaned down for a kiss.

"I love you Haruhi."

"I love you Kyouya."

"I love you both!" Tamaki's voice penetrated their special moment causing them both to start and leap away from the door that Tamaki occupied. He laughed and unfolded himself. He ran across the rooms cooping them both up into his arms declaring loudly his happiness at their forgiveness.

"You two are so cute together!" Suddenly Hunny's voice erupted from the door as well and Haruhi felt her face go beet red as the entire host club filed into the room. Kyouya's eyes had begun to twitch and she poked Tamaki in warning.

"Don't get mad at me! They already knew your secret." Tamaki hid behind Haruhi as a dark shadow passed over Kyouay's face.

"You two didn't expect us to be in the dark about your little relationship this entire time did you?" Karou and Hikaru leaned on both sides of Kyouya and winked at Haruhi who was turning redder with each moment.

"How did you know?" Haruhi demanded feeling herself grow irritated with them.

"We have our ways." They said and winked again before sauntering out of the room.

"Hurry up we're having a party downstairs for Kyouya's return!" Hunny said following the twins out of the door.

"Take your time." Tamaki smiled fondly as Kyouya took Haruhi's hand and pulled her close to him. She smiled up at the teen and rested her head against his heart.

"You don't have to worry about secrets anymore." Tamaki mumbled to the pair as he closed door behind him the last image he saw was Kyouya leaning down to her for a kiss just as the clouds parted a stream of light hit them illuminating them in a heavenly light.

A/N: The end :D

PS. I will be doing my Nanowrimo all month so no more stories for a way :(. Have a happy novel writting month :D


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